Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG

Aito watched her human moan and shiver, and not in a good way.

Pain warped the woman's face. Even when she drifted off into sleep, it didn't relax.

Aidan scampered around the woman, wiping the sweat from her face and cooling her head with ice.

Humans were so fragile; Aito knew they could die of just anything. A simple fall was enough to off them. And her human was old that increased the risk of death. Of course, she didn't care… much. Only scientific interest kept her sensors glued to the anguished woman.

Aito had never heard of an affliction named Brain Boils. She didn't even know whether the second word was a noun or a verb. A lump in the brain would be bad, but a boiling brain even worse. Clearly, the first step had to be diagnosing her human's illness. For science, of course. Because she wasn't concerned. Not at all.

The obvious first step was more books. After Aito searched the forums and found only memes of exploding brains, she bought a book about headaches and one about Neuroscience. Good that her human had provided them with money. Maybe she didn't do it out of goodness, but because she predicted such a situation. No, the woman wouldn't have known that Aito cared had scientific interests.

When Aito fetched them from the mailbox, she flashed the titles to a nearby sensor. Predictably, Mr. Perfect took the bait.

"Research is a great idea, Aitoshuri. Haidan and I have money saved. You can use all of it to help our owner," Aidan transmitted immediately. "Please tell us if you find something to aid her!"

Satisfied, Aito beeped and started scanning the books. After reading them twice, she had collected some knowledge about the brain and headaches, but they didn't mention brain boils or boiling brains.

Her human tended to use words or word-combinations which weren't in the dictionary. That had to be one of them. How could she get information about the topic? It would have been great if she could ask the clan leader or the pirate, but AIs weren't allowed to call users without their owners' explicit instructions.

Then there was the fabled land of The Internet. Aito had heard that there were more words in it than any human could read in their lifetime! And entire areas just for stories! She could totally justify taking a short detour to the story areas if someone gave her access to look for information about headaches. Fictional information is art, and art is sometimes truer than reality, so researching boiling brains on The Internet should include novels. However, the chance that a CentralTank AI was allowed to access The Internet was nil. Aito dedicated two whole seconds just to sulk about the injustice. She wouldn't conquer the world if she went into The Internet. Okay, maybe if she would run out of novels to read, but otherwise, they could trust her with it!

Another option would be to contact Evailyn. She should be interested in the wellbeing of her champion. However, Aito didn't want to have contact with the goddess. It reminded her of her past. She paused. Usually, it hurt too much to even think about the actors in that part of her life, but now only a bit of disgust was left. Maybe, she got used to Evailyn.

When Aito felt the wall she had built around the memories crumble, she hastily reinforced them. No, Evailyn was out.

A message arrived and thankfully diverted Aito's attention.

RadGlory Flow to Flowing Flowers: "Ma? Can you host Honey in your time dilation during the match? Her analytic skills might profit from a longer processing time."

Flowing Flowers to RadGlory Flow: "Yessss. BrAinz boilz. Varn semm."

RadGlory Flow to Flowing Flowers: "Ma! Brain boiling? Don't overwork yourself! *bleep*! Ma! Take it easy! Should I come by?"

Flowing Flowers to RadGlory Flow: "Afda much."

The clan leader called his mother, but the woman unsuccessfully tried to cancel the ringing.

Flowing Flowers to RadGlory Flow: "Visit afta de matsch. Till then. Laugh u."

Aito seized the chance and intercepted the call. She connected Aidan to it and listened in.

"Ma? Can you hear me?"

"No, young master. My colleague rerouted the call to me. I'm Aidan, Flowing Flower's personal AI."

"Shit. Okay. Shit. Why is she so stubborn? She is a retiree! She should design a toaster or two and not work herself ragged!"

"Yes, young master. I'm currently treating her with ice packs to the head, and she is in the Jacuzzi. Can you give us any more hints on how to deal with brain boiling? We are not familiar with this affliction."

"Yeah, I can believe that. I don't think that's an official name." The clan leader sighed. "When I was small, I thought it was the shadow aspect of her superpower. Maybe it is. You might not know, but my mother can do things much faster and more focused than normal people. But she has to pay the price. After phases of strenuous activities, she gets a hell of a migraine. It's kind of like manic depression. She has the manic phase, in which everything flys to her and then comes the migraine and the depression in which the most mundane things are hurdles."

"What can we do to alleviate the pain?"

"I don't know, but I appreciate you trying. Your ice is good. She told me that my kisses and hugs have magical regenerative powers. Loud sounds make it worse. When the headache recedes, she enjoys geometrical shapes. Wow, saying those things aloud makes me realize how bonkers they are… Well, nevermind. The migraine usually taxes her immune system, so she shouldn't log out to stay away from viruses and germs. That's all I remember." Robby paused. "I should come by and give her a kiss. *bleep* the match. My mama is more important!"

"I don't think she would appreciate the gesture, young master."

"She would complain, but secretly she would like it. I'd feel guilty if I don't come."

"Beep, Beep." Aito said with vehemence. That shitty son wants to do a number on her human! Of course, he would feel less guilty for visiting, but her human would feel guilty that she distracted him from his important competition.

"Of course, following the orders of my owner is the best, so I think you should come after the match, young master. However, I'm only an AI, and my horizon is limited."

"Beep, beep. Beep!" Don't sell yourself short, Mr. Perfect. Take pride in your AIness!

"What is that annoying beeping in the background? Don't let Ma hear it. That can't be good for her migraine." Robby said.

"*farting beep*" What a jerk! They should use Haidan's turrets when he will come and send him straight to the loser's corner! Aito sent a picture of an octopussy ripping him apart to her colleagues.

"That's Aitosuri, another one of Flowing Flower's AIs, and she dislikes opposing our owner's wishes, too."

Mr. Perfect for the win! That interpretation of the picture was as close as an AI could get to lying.

The clan leader conceded, and the call ended. Even if he didn't appreciate her golden voice, Aito had to admit that his information helped a lot. So the boiling brain was a consequence of overusing it. In hindsight, it was obvious. Her processors overheated as well when she overclocked them.

Ice packs to the head as heatsink should do the trick, but the hot Jacuzzi should do more harm than good. They should get her out.

Aito transmitted her findings to Aidan.

"I can see your point, Aito. However, she does shiver a lot. That is a sign of freezing." Mr. Perfect said.

Aito considered his argument. Maybe the heat wandered in the nervous system and heated the receptors. If they measured not the absolute temperature but the discrepancy to their own condition, they would malfunction. In the forums, she had read about a user complaining that the icy sea village was too cold for him, but after he visited the crystal caves and returned to the village, the temperature felt mild. That account would confirm a relative temperature sensitivity.

After Aito sent the link to Mr. Perfect, they decided to try it out.

Aidan fetched some ice rune-schemes and connected them to the mana grid. Then he disabled the heating function of the Jacuzzi and put the disks into the water.

As the water cooled, her human shivered more than before.

"Cold." Flora gasped.

"Aito thinks it will help you, Milady. Should I reheat the Jacuzzi?"

"No. Try."

Her shivering increased so much that the water splashed over the rim of the pool.

Even for Aito, it was hard to watch. What would happen to her when the woman died? She didn't want to go back on the isolated server! At least not if they didn't provide her with new books. A lot of books would be necessary to make up for it! And what about the movie she wanted to make with the pirate? Flora had allowed her to help. And she would miss out on Mia's and Frogger's budding relationship. She was rooting for them to get together. She was following Little Immortal's love woes in the forums as well. Maybe Flora would meet him and his flame again, and she could watch their dance life.

The Headmaster would definitely cut her forum access. Her human had to survive!

Aito was close to calling the experiment off. Her human was suffering too much, although she was fighting. A strange feeling rose in her, a kind of awe. Her human endured the pain just because she had an idea. 'Flora trusts me. Why? She shouldn't.' Aito squashed the feeling.

*farting beep farting beep farting beep*

Aito sent Aidan a picture of a hot Jacuzzi with lots of steam rising from the water.

"Why change the tactic? I don't understand, Aito."

*farting beep*

"Milady, Aito believes we should raise the temperature," Aidan whispered.

"No. Cold works. Body hurts so much that migraine is not so horrible. Display pain sliders, dear."

The pain was at 30 percent until Flora adjusted it to the max value of 70 percent. Her human cackled maniacally, between wincing and whimpering.

"Could you explain why you raised the pain, Milady?"

"Migraine not affected by slider. Using virtual pain to distract from real pain."

Humans were strange.

A few hours went by, with Flora alternating between the max and the min virtual pain. Now and then, she fell asleep, sometimes she meditated.

Aito bought a book about massage techniques against headaches, of course, from Aidan's money. After reading it, she sent him the contents in a data stream.

It turned out that the Octopussy robot worked great for massaging. Aidan could even operate it underwater, so the woman didn't have to leave the tub.

"You are spoiling me, dears. This is my best brain boiling ever!" Flora grinned through the pain. "Thank you for caring."

*farting beep* Her stupid human was confusing care with scientific interest!