Arrogance: Volume One of Ebb & Flow

With Maria coming over, I couldn’t bring the database inside. I’ll have Vivienne bring it by later and set it up. I’m itching to explore the computer and all the secrets it holds. I lie in bed, waiting for her to text me that she’s arrived. The personality pieces I’ve taken are muddling the waters of my mind. I’ve never been indecisive in my entire life, but now, the more things I experience and steal, the more unsure I become. Ending things with Maria is the easier choice, but a confluence of characteristics makes me question things. Am I feeling a sense of loyalty for her because of the last two years? Is this what is to become of me, a person paralyzed by doubts, unable to come to a satisfying conclusion? Does it matter how much harder she makes my life? No, it doesn’t. I’ve set my sights on the impossible, so I will keep Maria until I can’t. My phone vibrates, and it’s Maria.

(Maria): I’m here. Are you in your room?

Yeah.:(Eryk)

Searching my memories for every instance of intense sadness, I prepare myself. The hopelessness I saw in Aubrey’s face when I went to see her after I left the hospital. Marcus’ father’s blank stare when I visited, and then the raw emotion he showed at the funeral. My father and every time he found solace in the bottom of a bottle as the echoes of my mother haunted him. All of these images burn in my mind as I channel the sorrow into my face. I hear her footsteps, and I force myself to hyperventilate. I want to make it seem like I’ve been struggling.

Maria enters my room, standing in the doorway and looking at me. She’s wearing a purple and black plaid skirt and a navy blue sleeveless blouse with an open collar that shows off her necklace that says pretty in cursive. Black stockings complete her curated look. Maria always dresses so composed and carefully. Even though we’re currently in a fight, she took time to make sure she looked elegantly crafted. Neither of us speaks, and the silence is palpable. I use my arm to rub my face, making it look like I’m wiping away tears. Maria’s text made me believe she was desperate and emotional. The woman in front of me isn’t upset at all.

“You ready to tell me the truth?” Maria asked.

“Babe, I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“I want you to tell me the truth. I deserve honesty,” Maria said coldly.

She won’t drop this. “Okay, you’re right. I have been hiding something from you, but it’s not what you think. I’m not cheating. I think I’m becoming depressed, and I can’t get over what happened. Losing Marcus hangs over me like a guillotine. I can’t get it out of my head, the voice that says I should’ve done more. I shouldn’t have let Marcus sacrifice himself alone. He gave his life for all of us, and I wonder if it should’ve been me.”

I roll over, wrapping the blanket around me even tighter. The key is in the breathing. People who are haunted or sad have trouble voicing it. All this appears as a man teetering on the edge of something dark. Now fall for it and apologize, Maria. Then, we can go back to how it was before. I can’t see her from how I’m lying, but I feel her sit at the edge of my bed.

“Eryk, I watched you kill them,” Maria whispered.

What? What did she just say? Why hasn't she gone to the authorities if she saw me kill Marcus and Davis? All this time, I have been battling with how to handle our relationship in regard to my lack of feelings and managing hers. Think quickly and accurately: why is she revealing this now? I need to be careful not to say anything. She could be wearing a wire or some other form of recording device. I might be weaker than usual, but I should be able to overpower her easily. Strangulation so there’s no blood to clean up, then call Vivienne and have her get rid of the body. Or I could throw the blanket over her, climb on top, and beat her to death. I’ll have to get new sheets, but that’s a minor inconvenience.

Before I can figure out a plan, she’s climbed into the bed with me. Maria pries the blanket loose and gets in behind me. Her arms wrap around my chest, and her breath tickles my neck.

“For so long, I’ve dealt with this self-inflicted insecurity. That I wasn’t good enough for you, that I was a horrible person, and you deserved someone more pure. There’s something wrong with my mind or my heart that makes me possessive of you. I get these thoughts and urges when people talk to you, Eryk. I’m so jealous and hateful of anyone who takes up your time. Whether it be Aubrey, Jean-Luc, or Marcus. Or the fucking slut Melanie; I mean, everyone knows we’re dating. But for some reason, that stupid bitch keeps trying to interfere,” she said, her nails digging into me. “Sorry, my love, it’s just that I’ve really struggled, thinking that these feelings I have make me unworthy of you. You’re so good, kind, and wonderful. So when I finally saw it, this giant weight I’d been holding finally lifted. You aren’t perfect; you’re flawed, just like me, and it’s like I fell in love with you all over again. We share a darkness inside of us. But you came back, and you’re distant and cold to me. So, it leaves a girl wondering: Is there someone else?”

I feel something cold slide under my shirt and against my stomach. It’s the kitchen knife I was going to use on Vivienne. She isn’t trying to set me up or turn me in. She’s insane. She saw me kill two people in cold blood and didn’t do anything, but the thought of me cheating led her to this. Should I tell her the truth, that I’m a Cowl, and every night, I go out to further the plans for my criminal empire? None of my plans for our continuing relationship accounted for Maria knowing about the party. I have to rework my plan completely. There’s no way to kill her now without getting a knife through my guts. This also firmly makes my decision for me. I can’t break up with her; she’ll go to the cops, or she’ll kill me. There’s only one way to play this.

I grab her wrists and twist myself to be on top of her. She struggles against my grip as I pull her hands against the headboard of my bed. I slide my right leg up until my knee parts her legs and lean into her right ear. “Don’t ever threaten me.”

She drops the knife, and it falls behind the bed. Her face is reddened, and I slow my breathing to match hers. She tries to raise her head to kiss me, but I’ve got her pinned down. I bite her neck, and a moan escapes her lips. You’re not in control this time, Maria. I clasp her wrists together with one hand, freeing my other to undo her blouse. Her exposed chest rises as I trail a finger across her body. Gentle touches to tease and arouse her until she begs for release. I let go of her hands, and she pounced onto me, ripping my shirt off and unbuttoning my jeans. Maria grinds into me, and I feel the heat coming off her against my boxers. She knows what she wants, and nothing can stop her from getting it. At the very least, I’ve avoided getting stabbed.

Maria and I lie in bed, cuddling after sex. The room is quiet, but I have questions that need answering.

“You swear there’s no one else?” Maria asked.

“Maria, I love you, and I promise you’re the only girl for me.”

“Okay, good. Umm, can I ask you about it? The killing, I mean,” she said quietly.

Should I tell her about Nobody? How else would I explain killing Marcus and Davis? Maria thinking I’m some sort of homicidal serial killer isn’t the worst thing and does help me keep my Cowl identity a secret. At the same time, will she believe I just have an urge to kill? I need to relax and not overthink this. She might only have a mundane question, anyway.

“It’s out in the open now, and it feels good not to be hiding anything from you. If you want to ask about it, I’ll do my best to answer,” I said.

“What did it feel like when you took their lives?”

She doesn’t want to know why I did it, only how it felt. She should be scared of me, not asking what it feels like to kill someone. Does she think she’s safe or that I would never kill her? How is she so careless? A normal person wouldn’t be relieved if their partner murdered someone. What is she expecting me to say? Because the truth is that I felt nothing, and that won’t make her happy. I’ll just have to create a believable lie.

“Relief, I felt relief. For so long I’ve had this thing inside me that I had to ignore. Imagine starving a piece of yourself your entire life and then finally feeding it. I felt excitement when I killed Davis and Marcus, a thrill unlike any other. Maria, it was like everything grew brighter. The urges have always been there, but I could ignore them until the party. Being around so much death and destruction just awakened the monster inside me. It’s like I blacked out, and then before I knew it, I had slit Davis’ throat. I looked around for any survivors, and I was happy to have found a friend when I saw Marcus, but he recoiled away from me. My happiness changed to a sad fury, and I shoved the fire poker through his skull. I stopped Davis, I saved everyone, and he treated me like a wild animal, some sort of rabid beast. It made me feel shameful and alone,” I said.

It's a gamble, but it should work based on her reaction to me killing people.

“You have nothing to be ashamed of. You saved everyone, Eryk, you’re a hero. Who knows what Davis would’ve done if you hadn’t stopped him? Anyone who thinks otherwise deserves to die, sweetie,” she said while nuzzling my chest.

“I’m so relieved you don’t think less of me, Maria. And I hate lying to you, so I kept pushing you away to avoid having to keep doing it. I’d be lost without you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth. Keeping this secret from you has been so difficult and eating me alive. After Marcus’ reaction, I’ve been avoiding you because I was afraid of what would happen if I told you,” I said.

“You are the most important person in my life, the only one I couldn’t live without. But even a relationship as strong as ours can’t last without trust, and it’ll be a bit before I can fully trust you again. Eryk, I don’t care if you kill everyone in this fucking town, but don’t lie to me ever again,” Maria said.

“I won’t. No more lies, no more secrets, I promise.” I responded.

“In that case, can I ask a couple more questions?”

“I’ll do whatever it takes to regain your trust, Maria. Ask me anything you want,” I answered.

“Do you still feel like killing someone?” She asked.

What the hell kind of question is that? “No, all I can think of right now is how lucky I am to have such a supportive girlfriend,” I said as I kissed her head.

“Cute, but I’m serious, Eryk. I could help you handle your urges or whatever else you need,” she said.

“I can think of a few urges you can help me handle,” I said as I pulled her onto me.

Distract and deflect. We share an intense kiss as round two begins.

Maria ended up staying for much longer than I thought she would. I check my phone, and it’s almost four p.m. when I’m finally alone. Going forward, I need to be extremely careful around her. She’s much more unstable than I ever would have believed. Her knowledge about Marcus and Davis is a Sword of Damocles hanging above my head. I don’t think that Vivienne would be willing to murder my girlfriend for me, and the others might figure out my true identity if I ask them to kill a random teenage girl from a small town. No, if she is to die, it must be in a freak accident. After Maria drove home, I texted Vivienne to bring the database to my house ASAP. I’m itching to explore it, and my curiosity can’t be rebuffed.

My father still hasn’t returned by the time Vivienne comes over. Seeing her carry it up the stairs without breaking a sweat really shows me how strong she is. I am in great shape and still can’t hold a candle to her. She sets it down next to my desk for me; I’m not strong enough to lift it in my current state.

“There ya go, Eryk. Do you need anything else from me?” Vivienne asked.

I can’t wait to dive into the database. Should I let her stay? She pretty much knows what my power is now, so it couldn’t hurt to get her opinion on things.

“You can stay if you’d like. I’ll be planning a lot of our moves going forward tonight.”

“Is this thing that important? I was wondering why you wanted it so badly. It just lets you solve crimes via some algorithm thingy, right?”

“No, this is so much more than that. Vivienne, this computer is a goldmine for us. From what little I could see when we were in Kitt’s apartment, this has an incredible amount of information on Neuvohumans. If I hadn’t met him, I’d assume this belonged to a high-ranking person in BNA. I can use this to decide which powers to take and figure out who we’ll have to deal with in Quinstin,” I answered. I’m done dancing around the subject.

“I can’t believe you came out and said that. I thought we’d continue speaking in code for a while. Quinstin is certainly aiming high for your idea, not that I’d expect anything less than that,” Vivienne laughed.

“There’s no point in beating around the bush. You’ve all but figured out my ability anyway, so why not rip the bandaid off? Quinstin is the perfect city for what I have in mind, and you are going to be instrumental in making it a reality. There are so many powerful people in Quinstin for you to fight, And you will have to; my plans will piss off a lot of people.” She smiles at my comment. Little things like compliments and making her feel useful and needed will help further cement me as someone worth working for.

“I’m down. That city has some real-deal heavy hitters.”

“As long as you perform to the level I believe you can, then I doubt there’s many Neuvohumans you can’t beat. I’ll set this up real quick and you can join me. You never know if you might notice something I don’t,” I said.

“I’m not a big research my enemies type of girl, more of a punch the shit out of them type of girl, but you got my attention now. It is weird, though. How come nobody knew what his database was? Everyone thought it helped him somehow solve crimes, but it being a treasure trove of Neuvohuman information is crazy,” Vivienne said.

“He’s probably the one that started that rumor in the first place to disguise what it could do. I’m serious, V, this doesn’t make sense. Something isn’t adding up. There’s no reason for a random drug-addicted PI to have something like this. It almost feels like a trap, but the bait is too good to pass up.”

“I got your back, Nobody, err, I mean Eryk. No matter what comes of this, I got you,” she said.

Now that I’ve done it once before, setting up the database is easy. I take my time plugging everything in and double-checking the cables before I boot it up. Vivienne is sitting on my bed, watching me as the password screen appears. One four three two two four seven eight one five five six two one. I’ll never forget the password. The loading screen starts, and then we’re back in. I smile as I see all the tiny green boxes; the unlimited potential before me brings me a surge of happiness. Control F brings a search bar along with a dropdown menu. I can narrow it down by location, legal designation, ability type, and even ability tier. This is the Neuvohuman version of online shopping, except instead of buying clothes, I’m shopping for abilities.

First, I narrow it down to within a fifty-mile radius of New Farford. There’s no point in designating whether they are Cowl, Cape, or civilian. If they have something I want, I’ll take it. I press the enter key, and seventy-two results appear. Seventy-two powers to choose from, and that’s just the immediate area. I could go farther and see even more. Some results, such as Dynax, Froggy, Lee Daeshim, Veritas, Rushdown, Rorschach, Constrictor, Erisate, Vivienne, and Murmur, can be ignored. Ten Neuvohumans were eliminated from the list of seventy-two, but I still have sixty-two to pick through. Vivienne gasps behind me as I sift through the possibilities.

The first one to catch my eye is a Cape named Tramp. She’s a tier two Mentalist/Manipulator who can see trajectories of objects and make herself and other objects bouncier in a manner that defies physics. Her real name is Leena Diaz. She’s a twenty-seven-year-old Cape who’s been in the game for eight years. The fact she’s been active that long and hasn’t been killed means she’s highly skilled and intelligent. Inside her file are a few videos of her in action. As the CCTV footage plays, we see a girl wearing a gold and silver suit with a matching cape. The suit goes up and covers her mouth and nose, similar to a bandana. She has on a domino mask following her color scheme and a metallic bo staff in hand.

Tramp is in a jewelry store that is midway through a robbery. Five armed assailants wearing ski masks, one holding the bank manager hostage. Tramp jumps and dodges around the room, avoiding gunfire with practiced ease. The hostage holder shouts something at her, but the video has no audio, so we can’t hear it. Vivienne is off the bed now and hovering over my shoulder. Tramp doesn’t like whatever he says, and she does a handspring off the ground, launching up to the ceiling. She bounces off it and plants both feet into the hostage taker’s face. The bank manager takes the opportunity Tramp provides and runs out of the building.

Now, she can go all out without any civilians in the way. She throws her bo staff like a javelin into one of the burglars, hitting him through a display box. The staff bounces off him and knocks out two other gunmen before falling onto the floor. With only one left, she advances on him as he shoots at her. Rather than dodging, she grabs her cape edges and spins in place as the bullets ricochet off the cape into the surrounding store. The gunman quickly runs out of ammo, and she flicks her bo staff into the air with the top of her foot. As her weapon reaches chest level, she whips out a roundhouse kick, sending it spinning at him end over end. It strikes him right in the forehead, and he crumples to the ground. The video feed ends right after she defeats the last criminal. Utter destruction, she outclassed them in every single way. None of them were Neuvohumans, but without any casualties, she fought five-on-one with a hostage.

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT! She fucked them up good,” Vivienne yelled.

“Agreed. Could you do that?” I asked.

“I’m not sure. If you’re asking if I could beat five guys with guns, the answer is yes. If you’re asking if I could beat five guys with guns who have a hostage and I’m not allowed to cripple or maim, then maybe not. I can tell you one thing, though: she has professional training. Girl’s a beast. Are we going after her?”

We could; I want her powers. Vivienne, your ability is incredible, and you’re a phenomenal combatant, but we’re going to be fighting people even stronger and more skilled than she is. Are you going to be able to beat her? Because she’s a small fry in the grand scheme of things,” I said.

She looks frustrated with my question but doesn’t rebuke me. Tramp is nothing compared to Titania or some other big-name Capes in Quinstin. I need Vivienne to take this more seriously. She has every advantage imaginable against Tramp, but she’ll lose if she doesn’t go all out. This is a test, Vivienne, don’t fail me.

“I’ll handle her and bring her to you, no problem. I got this, Eryk. I won’t mess it up,” she said.

“Good. We need to secure a location to proceed with the next step. I need to figure out the limitations of my power and its effects on someone. Vivienne, I have a few powers I can think of that I’d like to give you, but I don’t know what will happen if you have two,” I said seriously. It would suck to have to find a new minion as powerful as her, who is unaffiliated.

“Wow, thanks, dude. But why don’t we just use the docks? The two gangs who operated out of it are gone, and it’s incredibly isolated. If Rorschach joins us, her ability can make sure that nobody goes in or out of the docks without us knowing. Sorry if you already crossed that off the list of potential places,” Vivienne said.

How did I overlook the docks? It’s the perfect place. This is a great chance to further our bond. “I’m going to be honest with you, Vivienne, it totally escaped my brain. The docks are exactly the kind of place I was thinking of. When you have time, can you go down there and remove the bodies and wreckage?”

“You got it. Do you want me to go now, or are there more files to look at?” Vivienne asked.

“Stay. It’s better if you know what you’re up against,” I said.

The next person’s file I open is a Tinkerer. Phillip Constanos is a forty-five-year-old civilian. He runs a hobby shop that sells remote control toys. His specialization is drone technology. He only uses his power to make the toys better and with more features. He doesn’t seem to make much money from his store, just enough to pay off his mortgage and save for retirement and his kid’s college fund. Due to his civilian status, there aren’t any videos to watch, but I note his name and location. You’ll be my offering for Kai.

I close out of his file and slowly go through the other sixty candidates. Anyone whose ability interests me is cataloged in my brain for retrieval. The final person we get to is an elementary school teacher named Anna Lee. Her power is a Mentalist/Manipulator combo. It warns not to approach her unprepared, or you’ll be affected, unaware of what has happened. She has a reactive ability that should be considered always set to on. If you attempt to act in a way that would be considered harming her in any form, it activates, pacifying you via intense feelings of affection. It forces your mind to see her in a positive light and incapable of wrongdoing. I continue to read and see she has multiple dropped abuse cases from previous students’ parents. Regardless of the evidence, the charges were inevitably dropped every time it went to court. There are over twenty cases, all of which found her not guilty. This woman’s ability is almost a form of brainwashing. She’s a small-town school teacher, and the charges always go away, so it doesn’t go any higher. And if they ever send a BNA member or a Cape who doesn’t know about her power, they’ll leave while thinking she’s Mother Theresa.

Vivienne is shaking; her grip on my chair is like a beartrap. Her breathing is uneven, and she is radiating anger. Anna broke Vivienne’s one rule, the one thing that triggers her rage. She’ll attack this woman with or without me. I could use this to further tether V to me. If I act decisively, she’ll see me in an even better light.

“We need to do something about her immediately,” I said.

Vivienne’s grip loosens as she exhales a deep breath. “We agree on that. Eryk, I’m going to kill this bitch. She’s a fucking teacher, taking advantage of her position to hurt children. I don’t just want her to die; I want her to suffer.”

“She lives in Fairboro. We could be there in an hour. If you’re serious about her suffering, then we need to stop and pick up some supplies. We need chains and tape to keep her contained. There’s a hardware store on the way,” I said.

Vivienne nods and heads downstairs to her car. I throw my mask into my backpack, ensuring I don’t leave my phone. If Maria calls or texts, I need to be able to respond instantly. Attentive boyfriends who aren’t hiding secrets always respond to their girlfriends promptly. I zip up my hoodie, throw my backpack over my shoulder, and head outside to Vivienne. Anna Lee has given me an idea about what to do with certain Neuvohumans I kill—a way to distract Capes and cover up my actions. Trigger events are caused by a moment of extreme mental, emotional, or physical stress. I need chaos to cause more trigger events for me to profit from. More people with powers means more personality pieces to acquire. I’ll invent someone to stoke the fires of tension between Capes and Cowls, Neuvohumans and humans—an evolutionary race war as the backdrop of our century.