Accountant Isekai

If you told me, a bit over 15 years ago, that I was going to be involved in a secret meeting between national leaders...I probably would not have believed you. If you told me that it would be between Medieval leaders, I'd have thought you were insane.

Hell, I'd have thought that if you told me it a few months ago.

But here I was, sitting in a secret room in King Eduard the Defenestrator's castle. His Majesty himself was there along with Queen Eleanor, Prince Jeremy, and Duke Armand. Three crystal balls were with us. One had Queen Hildoara, another Prince Wisimir, and the third Duke Carini. From what I heard, Duke Carini was Hildoara's right-hand man. Wisimir was Hildoara's brother.

At the moment, Prince Jeremy was looking between Queen Hildoara and me. The latter glanced at me quickly before looking at King Eduard and Queen Eleanor. My monarchs had expressions of utter calmness. However, I suspected that King Eduard the Defenestrator wanted to throw the entire Kingdom of Motteburh out a window.

Currently, I was nervous out of my fucking mind! This meeting would decide the fate of multiple kingdoms, and I was completely unqualified to be here! I had no fucking idea why King Eduard included me in the first place! I was struggling so hard not to shake, and sweat poured down my body.

"Now, let us begin this meeting," King Eduard said. "I tried to call Dalv Sepet for it, but he was busy."

"I tried to call him too," Queen Hildoara stated.

"How could he be so busy that he'd refuse a meeting with multiple monarchs?" Prince Wisimir wondered.

"He's probably impaling people," I spoke up. "He does that a lot."

Queen Eleanor nodded.

"That is putting it mildly. It's his preferred method of execution. Honestly, you could probably call him Dalv the Impaler," she commented.

I struggled to avoid saying that his last name spelled backward means "the Impaler" in Romanian. A part of me wondered just what Queen Eleanor would think if she knew who Dalv was in his last life. But that was smothered out by the part of me that was completely fucking terrified of saying something wrong and getting thrown out a window.

"Yes, now that the meeting's started," Prince Wisimir nodded. "Saint Gustav, what do you think is the ideal honeymoon spot?"

I held up my hand.

"No thanks, Your Highness. I'm not gay. And I'm pretty sure gay marriage isn't a thing in Greenrivers and Vandalland," I said.

Dʰéǵʰom's laughter flooded my ears. Everyone else in the room looked incredibly confused.

"He wasn't talking about marrying you! He was talking about marrying his sister!" Dʰéǵʰom stated.

"Dʰéǵʰom, I don't think he's into his sister. That's a messed-up level of inbreeding, even for the Hapsburgs," I thought.

The god just laughed harder.

"Oh, man, I needed this!" he said.

"I thought you were very gay, Saint Gustav," Queen Hildoara stated, remaining formal.

"No, I'm straight," I replied.

King Eduard looked confused.

"Why can't you be straight and gay?" he asked.

Oh, fuck. Gay isn't a term for homosexual in this world.

"I apologize for the confusion, Your Majesties," I bowed, smacking my head against the table. "I spent a lot of time in a local region where gay is used as slang for homosexual."

Prince Wismir's eyes slowly widened in shock and revelation. He started waving his hands around.

"I didn't mean marrying me! I'm not homosexual either!" he started. "I meant marrying my sis..."

Before he could continue, King Eduard interrupted him.

"This is not the time to discuss marriage alliances. Right now, our priority is Motteburh," the monarch said.

He looked at Queen Hildoara.

"Saint Gustav told me that Motteburh recently cut off trade with Vandalland," King Eduard stated.

"He told you correctly, King Eduard. Saint Gustav also informed me that you do not think this is just about the recent alliance," Queen Hildoara replied.

King Eduard the Defenestrator nodded.

"Yes. Duke Armand, I believe you can explain best," he said.

"With pleasure," the nobleman replied.

Duke Armand stood up. He pulled back a curtain. Behind it was a living doll woman with a large sheet of wood with numerous drawings and words on it. There were lines connecting them like something a conspiracy theorist would make.

"For several years now, Motteburh influences have crept into Greenrivers," Duke Armand stated, pointing at his board. "There have been groups of nobles who gather, plotting to take away the rights of the commons, lock the social classes, and give the nobility complete tax-exempt status. Some of them even use the marcher lord title as justification, saying it has precedence."

King Eduard scoffed.

"A temporary title is not precedence for tax exemption of an entire class," he said.

"Very correct, Your Majesty. It is a shame that there are nobles who are quite foolish," Duke Armand nodded before moving his finger along his board. "I have dealt with these gatherings of nobles as much as I could, but some of them slipped through my cracks. They have been getting bolder. A few months ago, one of them dared approach His Majesty and demand Motteburh-like reforms be made. For that, he was justly thrown out a window."

Queen Hildoara spoke up.

"King Eduard, why do you like throwing people out windows so much? It's even in your name," she said.

"It is not an issue of enjoying it. I merely wished to have a trademark," King Eduard explained.

"A...trademark?"

The King of Greenrivers nodded.

"I was young and sickly at the time. Magic had not entered the world yet, and many did not think I would survive past my 20s. I wanted to be known for something in the short time I had. So, I decided that all my executions would be performed through defenestration," he stated.

"And you were fine with being known as 'the king who likes throwing people out of windows?'" Hildoara asked.

"Yes. There are no other kings known for this. And even if I die, I doubt there ever will be," King Eduard answered.

He has a point. No kings in my old world were known for this either.

"Back to the main topic," the King of Greenrivers said.

He then gestured to Duke Armand, who continued speaking.

"I have found some connections between this Motteburh-like movement and people from Motteburh. Many of the Greenrivers nobles involved in it have spoken with Motteburh nobles. However, this always happened after they started holding their Motteburh-like ideals. This movement could be from the nobles themselves. But I find it far more likely that agents from Motteburh have been spreading them."

Queen Eleanor nodded.

"Motteburh's spymaster is a genius. If he is involved in this, even Duke Armand would struggle to find his agents," she said.

"I suspect that Motteburh has some involvement in the recent mercenary attacks on Greenrivers," King Eduard the Defenestrator stated. "And their attempted interference in our recent treaty is further evidence of that, Queen Hildoara."

Duke Carini nodded.

"Motteburh's largest border is shared with Greenrivers. Its borders with Vandalland, the Barbarian Kingdoms, and the sea elf settlements are smaller. And the border with Greenrivers is a river, while it's a mountain with Vandalland. If they want to influence a foreign power with a lot of influence, Greenrivers is their best target," he said.

Queen Hildoara's expression turned pensive.

"Do you think they're trying to get your nobles killed? If you execute the nobles who take up this ideology, King Eduard, you'll end up thinning out your noble class and lowering the warriors you have," she suggested.

"That might be their plan: weaken my forces and then invade," he replied.

Ah, King Eduard, ever the hypocrite. At least, by the standards of my time in my old world. He invades the weaker powers and then gets mad when someone else tries to invade Greenrivers.

Unfortunately, I live in Greenrivers and I don't want it to get invaded. So, that means I'm on his side.

Fortunately, our enemy is Motteburh. So, I don't feel bad in the slightest about going against them.

"You don't know the half of it," Dʰéǵʰom sighed.

"There are other possibilities too," Queen Eleanor stated. "They might be trying to weaken us to make some demands or just trying to spread their type of government."

I nodded.

"It's entirely possible that, after hundreds of years of making excuses for banning social advancement and treating commoners horribly, the Motteburh nobles started believing their own lies. They might even think they're doing us a favor by spreading their ideology," I said.

King Eduard the Defenestrator's expression remained stable.

"They are quite delusional if they started to believe their own lies," he stated. "Now, as to Vandalland's problems with Motteburh. Dealing with them is a good way to start our retaliation."

Queen Hildoara nodded.

"This normally wouldn't be a big problem, but Vandalland is having financial issues," she admitted.

"Greenrivers is the same," Queen Eleanor stated.

"Fortunately, Saint Gustav here has a solution to that," King Eduard said before turning to me. "Tell them about your plan regarding the sea elves."

Oh, fuck! I'm right in the spotlight! I jumped up, forcing down my shaking.

"Yes, Your Majesty. The sea elves can travel the ocean because they have a deal with the god of the sea. From what I understand, whenever someone else tries, they get eaten by a sea monster," I said before clarifying. "With some exceptions."

"That is correct," His Majesty confirmed.

I gave him a nod before continuing.

"If we can get the sea elves of Greenrivers and Vandalland to start sea trade, then they could make a lot of money from buying and selling foreign goods. This will increase tax revenue for both Greenrivers and Vandalland."

Queen Hildoara pressed a hand to her chin, pondering things. Duke Carini spoke up.

"The Southern City States in particular are ripe for this sort of trade," he said.

"The problem is encouraging the sea elves to engage in legitimate trade and not go back to piracy. I doubt they would listen to me or Saint Gustav. As far as even non-magical elves are concerned, my conquests of their lands are recent. And there is a massacre that is still fresh in their minds. I punished the noble who committed it, but that does not matter to most of the sea elves," King Eduard the Defenestrator stated.

Queen Hildoara looked right at me.

"Why wouldn't they listen to you?" she asked.

A chill of nervousness pulsed through me. Fear crawled up my spine like a centipede.

"My wet nurse's mother was the one behind the massacre," I answered.

Queen Hildoara gave me an understanding nod.

"Sins of the parents are often blamed on the children," she noted.

"Well, I have some ideas for getting the sea elves to go into trade," I tried to get us back on the main topic. "Your Majesties could lower taxes specifically for sea-based trade. And just that. Your Majesties could also exempt sea-based traders from military service."

King Eduard spoke up.

"After consulting with my advisors, I determined that exemption from military service is the best course for Greenrivers. There is a chance that not enough sea elves will go to sea to make up for the tax decrease in that form of trade. On the other hand, sea elves make up a negligible amount of my military," he said.

"And then there is the issue of land-based merchants. In Greenrivers, only sea elves and perhaps humans they bring with them can trade on the ocean. Lowering taxes for just sea-based trade would anger merchants who are stuck trading overland," Queen Eleanor added.

Queen Hildoara pondered a moment.

"Most of Vandalland's treasury comes from mines owned by the crown. I will need to discuss this with my advisors," she stated.

"Then, we will adjourn this meeting until you've discussed things with them," King Eduard said.

Relief flowed through my body as I sat down again. This was very stressful, but at least it was over now. Well, I'd be stuck in some other meeting soon enough. The point is that I had a break.

Or so I thought. Then, a sensation flowed into my body. It was faint and only lasted a moment. But it was there. This feeling was a strong urge. I felt like I had to go to...someplace. There was a vague sense of direction, but nothing specific.

This was still enough for me to figure out what that feeling was. I planted my head in my hands. All eyes turned to me.

"Gustav, are you alright?" Hildoara's expression turned urgent.

"I'm fine," I said. "I just started feeling the pull of the Equinox."

King Eduard's expression turned to one of exasperation.

"By the gods, I thought we'd have more time. But if you're starting to feel the pull..." he grimaced.

The King and Queen Eleanor marched to the door.

"Of all the times to have to talk to a priest..." King Eduard shook his head.

"Jeremy, keep an eye on things in the castle until we return," Queen Eleanor said.

They left the room. The moment the door was closed, Prince Wisimir spoke up.

"Saint Gustav, what sort of wedding dresses do they have in Greenrivers?" he asked.

"It would not be appropriate for a prince to wear a dress to his wedding," Duke Carini said.

"I meant for Hildoara!"

"Shouldn't I wear a Vandalland dress?" she questioned.

"Saint Gustav should wear Vandalland attire," Prince Wisimir said.

Prince Jeremy put his head in his hands.

"By the gods, why couldn't you just send me to the church, Father, Mother? Why did you have to go yourselves and just leave me here?" he muttered to himself.

I turned to Prince Jeremy with a sympathetic expression. By the look of things, he was feeling the same way I was.