A Woman of the Swamp

Brunch with a Vampire



12. Brunch with a Vampire

The mansion’s long table was laden with food, despite having only three places set. Plates of beignets with multicolored dipping sauces adorned the edges, surrounding several serving trays of potato hash mixed with sausage and seafood. Generous glasses of champagne and orange juice were arranged at intervals around the table. The feast looked like it was enough to feed twenty rather than three.

Jackie motioned for his guests to sit down, taking a seat at the head of the table. “It really is a treat to have company. Our chef gets bored cooking small portions for me, so I hope you’ll forgive his extravagance.” Jackie picked up a beignet and took a bite. “Absolutely heaven,” he said, mouth still full of food. Then, unceremoniously spat it into a silver bucket beside his chair. He turned his eyes on Shirley. “You will forgive the practice, but people in my condition can’t actually ingest food. If I were to keep it down, it wouldn’t be for long and would make for a wholly unpleasant brunch experience.”

Nick took the glass of champagne nearest him, ignoring the orange juice. He tossed it back in a single gulp. The fizzy mixture rushed through him, clearing out the morning fog.

“It’s good to see some things never change.” Jackie snapped his manicured fingers and a waiter appeared from behind a velvet curtain with another bottle of champagne. “Leave the bottle. Our guest is thirsty and has had a rough morning.”

Nick eyed the butler. The man’s outward expression was nothing if not cordial as he set the bottle down, but there was a cool resentment beneath the surface. Prickles of familiarity, followed by tension made their way up Nick’s neck. He waited until the butler left again to let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Did that man work for—”

“Winston? Yes, and he’s not a fan of yours. Call it a personal jest on my part. Usually, I have him working the kitchens, but I couldn’t resist when I found out you two have a history.”

“History being he tried to kill me.”

“Seems like most people we end up meeting.” Shirley dropped the pretense and took a beignet. An audible sound of delight escaped her lips and she flushed before silencing it.

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed. These are the best beignets in all New Orleans, and I keep them for myself. If they ever got out in the street, there’d be a line around the block and Café Du Monde would be out of business.” Jackie dipped a beignet of his own in dark sauce and popped it into his mouth before spitting it out once again. “Just delightful.”

Nick refilled his glass, summoning the courage to ask Jackie for the information they’d come for. He wasn’t even quite sure how to phrase it. Hi, Jackie, know anything about a world-ending level necromancer running around New Orleans? Thanks, Nick. The thought was absurd, but with each passing sip of champagne, became more realistic. Nick was working up the courage to ask when Jackie broke the silence.

“I’m no fool, I know this is a business call.” He took a drink from his own champagne glass and spit it into the bucket.

“Well, if you’re already in contact with The Sixth Side, then you know why we’re here.” Shirley folded her arms and stared at Jackie.

Nick wished he had taught her a thing or two about vampiric hypnosis. Staring down the barrel of an angry night walker was a sure-fire way to end up charmed.

Thankfully, Jackie had more class than that, and merely lifted his hands in a shrug. “Sure, I have some idea, but I want to hear your appraisal of the situation. Both of you, really. I know Nick doesn’t much care for necromancers, and given that you’re a government agent, I’m guessing it’s less personal and more good business.”

Shirley picked up a serving spoon and pushed some hash onto her plate. “You have coffee here? I talk a lot better with a cup of coffee.”

“Of course.” Jackie had barely snapped his fingers when the butler reappeared carrying a silver carafe and a set of white cups.

Shirley gave the butler a polite nod. “Alright, a few years ago, a high-profile vampire was freed by an amateur necromancer. Ring a bell?”

Jackie considered it. “You must forgive me; we’ve freed a lot of vampires over the last three years and plenty of people in New Orleans consider themselves amateur necromancers.”

He was toying with her. Nick knew it and Shirley knew it too. Vampires loved mind games, however small.

“This one came out from behind a door shut with 800 nails.” Nick waited for a reaction to the words. He didn’t have to look hard.

Jackie reared back in hyperbolic disgust. “The casket girl?” He spat on the floor, purposefully missing the food bucket. “Now, why on earth would I want to free a monster like that? You don’t get the pope to bless nails on a whim; that shit takes work. Do you have any idea how hard it was to get expedited shipping on those in the 1800s?” Genuine fervor crept into his voice. “That woman has made my life a living hell.”

“Funny, given your love of New Orleans history, she sounds right up your alley.” Shirley relaxed back in her chair, watching Jackie.

He steepled his fingers and leaned over them. “This one is bright and bold, Nick, very much like yourself. I’m guessing she knows how dangerous it is to anger me in my own house?”

Shirley tensed, her hand subtly dropping toward her pistol.

Nick saw the motion and immediately moved to defuse. No matter how fast she drew, Jackie would see it, and brunch would become a blood bath. “I informed her of your power, Jackie, yes, but also that you’re an old friend. How many stake-happy meatheads have I thrown off your scent?”

“More than I care to count.”

“And who got rid of that Sumerian bog rat infestation at your lovely little chalet?”

Jackie winced. “That would be you.”

“And what about that man in Th—”

“Yes, alright, Nick. You are a friend and I mean you no harm.”

“Could have fooled me with the murderous ghost trying to burn us alive,” Shirley said through a mouth full of potatoes.

“Again, I mean you no harm, Nick, but she’s pushing it.”

“Shirley, just enjoy the food and let me do the talking.” Nick wasn’t used to being the diplomatic one and he found he didn’t enjoy it. “So, vampire coming out of the Ursuline Convent. You know her, but you’re not the one that sprung her?”

Jackie let out a long sigh. “Yes, I put in the damned nails myself.”

Nick’s eyes widened. “You, in a convent?”

“Things were different back then. People only knew me as an eccentric aristocrat. I could get into any building in the city without trouble.”

“But the legend said you were the one to bring those girls across,” pointed out Shirley, not content with the silence.

“I’m not sure how that rumor got started, but that’s all it was, a rumor. Those young women came over on their own volition. They were all vampires before they got here, and they wreaked some serious havoc on this poor town. Before they arrived, I had been clandestine about my feeding. I had no desire to be anything other than a strange man with untold wealth. So, the girls had to be dealt with.”

“Why only lock one in the convent?” asked Nick.

“Because the rest of them at least had sense. When I came to them and explained the precarious position they were putting our kind in, they were quick to accept it and change their ways. Samantha…” he paused, the simple mention of the name causing him great pain. “That woman did not like being told what to do and continued as if nothing happened. When you hear the stories of infant mortality going up and strange murders in the dark corners of the city, that was her. She was feral, feeding whenever and on whatever. Some vampires believe the world is their plaything. I saw she was bad for business, hid in the convent, and sealed her in.”

Lines of pain creased Jackie’s ageless face. “The fact that she’s out means that I’ve got several problems in addition to government agents knocking on my door. There’s only one person that would want to free a madwoman like that, and he’s not high on anyone’s list of friends.”

“Baron Samedi.” Nick couldn’t quite piece it together, but a trickster god who enjoyed sowing chaos seemed like the right choice.

“Prick. Calls himself a god and causes nothing but mischief. More than a few of my ships sunk on their way over from the old lands at the hands of him and Anansi.”

“Another trickster god,” added Nick for Shirley’s benefit.

“We’re dealing with two gods now?” Shirley didn’t seem so much surprised as mildly inconvenienced.

“Thankfully, no. Anansi has retired to Africa, hasn’t been to the Americas in a long time, and we should count ourselves lucky. But, The Baron, he never left, and he’s always looking for souls to sell down below. He’s probably got a personal discount with The Devil at this point, and this sounds exactly like his handiwork.”

“I can confirm that,” answered Nick. “We recently freed the former necromancer he used to bust out your friend.”

Jackie’s eyes lit up with suspicion. “And why would you do a fool thing like that? You know The Baron isn’t fond of reprisals.”

“You’ve got problems, we’ve got problems. Escaped vampires are nothing when you’ve got a rogue necromancer ready to wreak havoc.”

“Ah, the walking corpses and abominations skulking out of the swamps? They are making my evening walks tiresome.”

“My question is, what would The Baron want with a pissed off vampire and a bunch of corpses?”

“Probably trying to finish his work from hundreds of years ago. When I first came here, he tried to sack the city, and he’s not going to be happy until it’s a pile of burning rubble. Something about expanding his power and creating an influence outside of New Orleans through fear. I could never follow the man’s monologuing if I’m being completely honest.”

“They love to do it.” Nick had seen more than a few gods monologue. “King of the Dead is particularly bad.”

“I heard about your little trip down South. What was he like? How was The Land of the Dead?” The calculated demeanor left Jackie in a hurry to be replaced by excitement.

“I think that story is best left for another time,” cut in Shirley.

“She really is no fun.”

Shirley rolled her eyes. “So, Baron Samedi is trying to turn New Orleans into a smoking crater. I don’t exactly see how that helps us.”

“I wasn’t trying to be helpful.” Jackie twiddled his fingers.

“Well, this has been a giant waste of time.”

“So easily wounded. Don’t worry, I can give you one thing, a name.”

Shirley’s rage bubbled to the surface. “And are you going to give us that name?”

“Yes, but I can already tell you, you’re not going to like it. I’m not sure how helpful it’s going to be.”

“We’ll take what we can get,” said Nick, once more trying to defuse.

“The man’s name is Ray.”

Nick’s blood went cold as ice. It can’t be the same Ray, right?

“Great, we’ll just get a phone book.” Shirley stood up from the table to leave.

“Oh, you won’t be needing that. I believe you’ve recently come across an ex-necromancer. They’re related.”

Nick’s heart sank.

At the same moment, Shirley’s phone rang.


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