A Murder Wizards Adventure

Yesterday I turned six years old, which means its 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 time for me to leave the academy. Or at least I hope so, right now it's the end of the last class of the last day of the week and everyone is packing up to leave, I tell my 'friends' to go on ahead without me and wait for the classroom to be empty.

Only when the last kid trickles out of the door, and I'm left alone with Koro-Sensei does he seem to notice me,

"ah Haruno-kun, what can I do for you?"

Well I suppose it's like ripping off a Band-Aid,

"Yes Koro-Sensei, I would like to apply for early graduation please"

Doesn't hurt to be polite.

"uhh, Haruno-san, while it's a good thing to be eager, being a ninja is not such a simple thing, i think it would be best for you to stay in the academy for a few more years before thinking about graduating."

Ok, well I did expect this kind of response, it would be pretty dumb if he was just like 'oh yeah sure', still, it's annoying, so without responding I just do a little show, first I henge into Koro-Sensei, then I make three clones and lastly, I use kawarimi jutsu to swap places with my chair.

All without hand seals of course

After a few moments silence I swap back with the chair and look Koro-Sensei in the eye,

"I would like to apply for early graduation please"

He seemed to need a moment to gather himself before he just sort of sighs and mutters something I couldn't hear,

"Very well, Haruno-san, come back here tomorrow and I will have the graduation tests ready for you."

"Thank you, Sensei"

And with that, I am on my way to being a murder wizard.

I can't wait.

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The next day couldn't have come sooner, normally this is when I'd say that I skipped my morning calisthenics to make sure I'm top form for the test, but I don't do morning calisthenics, cuz I'm super lazy which, again, is a big part of why I want to be in ANBU.

I certainly don't have the ability to motivate myself to train, no matter how strong I want to be, but in ANBU I highly doubt they'd allow me to slack, which is exactly what I want, someone to push me and push me and not really care if I can handle it.

Am I a masochist?

I don't think so.

hmmm

Well, no time to ponder, it's time for my tests.

Entering my homeroom, I am greeted not just by Koro-Sensei, but also two other ninjas. My examiners I presume.

Closing the door behind me I walk up to them, ignoring the incredulous stares, and bow politely,

"Koro-Sensei, Ninja-san, Other Ninja-san, I am here for my exam."

Other Ninja-sans lip twitches at the nickname then he speaks up first in the brief silence that followed my introduction,

"Really Karito, this is the kid you were talking about? he looks like he's barely learned how to walk"

I will have you know I have been walking for five years now, obviously, I didn't say that out loud.

"He may not look like much Tamaki, but the kid can do the academy three all without hand seals already."

Following Koros' words, Ninja-san speaks up for the first time,

"Well then brat, that will be your first test, show us the academy three"

At his prompting I repeat the show I gave Koro yesterday only this time I henge into Tameki, only I was wearing a shirt saying 'dumbass here' with a big red arrow pointing to my face.

Seeing the addition, Tamakis mouth twitches again and the other two just smile a little at Tamaki. heh. Thats what you get for insulting me. Petty revenge is the best revenge.

"I think that's a rather easy pass there," Ninja-san speaks up, "and now that we know you aren't necessarily just an overconfident brat, I'll explain the rest of the tests.

first of all, my name is Tameki, and all three of us are your examiners, now normally the practical part of the graduation exam is just a basic physical and a demonstration of the academy three, however for an early graduation the tests are much more in depth."

Tamaki pick up from there,

"The first test you have already done, following this we will go out to the yard and do a series of exercises, first will be an obstacle course, after that will be shurikenjutsu, after that will be a one hundred metre sprint, then a spar with Tameki, after that you will need to perform a jutsu of at least C-Rank and finally will be the genjutsu test. Any questions?"

"When do we start?"

Man, I've always wanted to say that.

"Now. Obviously? what did you think we'd just stand around and do the tests in an hour? we are busy people"

...

Goddamnit Tameki why do you have to ruin everything you wet sock of a man. Obviously, I didn't say that out loud.

Instead, we walk over to the academies upper yard which I've never been to before, since it's for the graduating class, where I see that a giant square tunnel, maybe ten plus metres tall, that loops around to make a three-sided square, so that the entrance and exits are facing the same way and honestly it is way bigger than I thought it would be... heh.

Shaking my head and focusing back on my surroundings as Tamaki rounded on me,

"Alright brat, that is the first test, the obstacle course, stand over there and wait for my signal then run through the course as fast as you can. oh, and if you touch any grass or walls then you're disqualified."

With that ominous warning, here I am staring at a five-metre-tall wall, presumably the first obstacle, I don't even know what I will be facing either, which in hindsight is probably why it's a tunnel in the first place, though it doesn't have a ceiling, presumably both so my examiners can watch, and also probably for light too.

"GO!"

I jolt a little at the unexpected start before rushing towards the wall, not slowing my pace as I run into it and 𝘶𝘱 as I use the tree walking technique and completely ignore the few ropes hanging down, when i get to the top I vault over and take in my surroundings,

The second obstacle gives me ninja warrior flashbacks 'heh ironic', as it is a series of ten diagonally facing platforms with green grass growing beneath them, clearly to make us actually use the platforms, which I do, they were quite far apart for my little legs, but nothing a little chakra enhancement can't solve.

The next obstacle also has grass, meaning I can't jump to the ground, instead there are a series of thin poles hanging from bars connecting the two walls, not wasting any time, and not willing to lose my momentum, once I reach the last platform I jump for the first pole, and start swinging myself across, and other than the uncomfortable grip positioning, it wasn't that much different to monkey bars.

Thankfully when I get to the end of the poles, I see the ground change from grass to sand, and that I am approaching the first corner, landing in a roll I quickly turn the corner and am met with a wall of wood momentarily making me pause, except upon closer inspection I see that it is actually just a corridor stuffed full of thin wooden beams, criss-crossing seemingly randomly and looking a lot like those laser traps in spy movies.

Picking up speed again I begin to limber my way through, some of the gaps are really small but luckily, I am small too, not to mention I am incredibly flexible, still is takes a small while to crawl through what I'm just going to call the laser wall, and once I'm clear through I see the next corner and understand why it took so long, and it would probably take a lot longer if I wasn't doing this alone.

Rounding the corner, I am met with more grass and a collection of rotating, steel-studded wooden posts each section looking as if they move independently of each other, it honestly reminds me of that scene in Kung Fu Panda, except even harder because I can't touch the floor and thus will have to walk on the lower beams, I briefly thought about just jumping across the tops of them but a look up and I can see bits of grass dangling down... damn sneaky murder wizards.

Not wasting anymore time I get to it, and it really is harder than it looks, I jump onto the first low hanging beam, and stick myself to it so I don't fall but then as it spins, I hit two other beams which then spin in a chain reaction causing the whole damn room to spin, once the beam I'm standing on has finished half a rotation i stem onto another, sticking to that as well, and am immediately hit in the back of the head by a studded pole and "OWW" it HURT.

"THIS IS CHILD CRUELT- OW!!"

Unfortunately my scream doesn't change anything, and I get hit twice mor for being distracted.

I don't really want to talk about how it went from there, I made steady progress, and managed to dodge or redirect a few beams, but by the time I cleared the last beam and jumped gratefully onto a thin platform that works as a reprieve from the grass.

I take a moment to just breath because '𝘰𝘸𝘸𝘸' I am going to have so many bruises.

Having (mostly) caught my breath I take a look at my next obstacle only to frown in confusion because it's just an empty patch of grass till the exit, now maybe it's because I just got smacked around a bunch, but I don't really bother to think if there's anything more to this, which there probably is, instead I take a deep deep breath, reach inside myself, and spit out a torrent of fire bigger than I've ever done before, as if to make my frustrations visible.

As the fire clears, I have a satisfied smile on my face. in spite of the sweat pouring down my brows, both from the fire itself but even more from the exhaustion of using so much chakra at once.

heh.

They only said I couldn't touch the grass, nobody said anything about simply removing the grass.

Happy with the destruction I caused, I sprint the remaining distance, belatedly remembering that I'm on a timer.

Emerging from the lightly steaming exit I am greeted with complete silence and the twitching, dry faces of my examiners.

"What?" I ask, conveniently ignoring the sound of fire spreading up the walls.

*Sigh*

"Whatever brat, come on, its time the second test, Tameki, put out the fire please."

After getting an acknowledgment from Tameki we moved on over to where a line of straw mannequins have been set up adjacent to the one hundred metre track at varying distances,

"Alright brat for this test you have twenty Kunai and Twenty Shuriken, you are scored on accuracy and distance, start when you're ready."

Nodding an acknowledgment, I approach the kunai first and set my sights on the target at the end of the track, 'one hundred metres, should be doable', and taking a throwing stance I proceed to do just that, landing all twenty without complication.

Now.

Now comes the shuriken, I glare briefly at the pointy frisbee wannabees before I take one in my hand, lock onto the farthest target, I bring my arm back and launch it forward with a swish, only to watch as it veers completely of course and hits a tree,

I stoically grab another shuriken, this time aiming for a target at the halfway mark... which I also mis completely, though the trees were spared this time,

Still staying stoic and ignoring the stares from my examiners I grab another shuriken, this time aiming for the closest target, only ten metres away. 'I got this'. I didn't got this, my shuriken somehow swerved and missed completely, and I hate frisbees.

Annoyed at my inability to understand shuriken I grab the seventeen remaining pain plates and throw them all at once, surely with buckshot I will land something, right?

Right?

...

Wrong apparently, as in what I can only assume is an act of God, not a single shuriken hits a target.

Silently I turn to my examiners.

"The next test?"

*Sigh* *Sigh*

oi.

"Right, the one hundred metre sprint, line up and go on my signal."

I move across to the track, and see Tameki go about picking up all the kunai and shuriken 'isn't he supposed to be an examiner? why does he seem more like a chore boy?'.

Shaking my head I focus back on the track, ready this time for the abrupt start,

"GO!"

And I do, I pump more chakra in my legs than usual and run as hard as I can, and in no time at all, i have passed the finish line.

Panting with my hands on my knees, I'm belatedly wondering if having the spar as the next test was supposed to be incentive to keep track of your reserves.

"Ok now you'll get a five minutes rest before your spar with Tameki."

Well, I guess not then, taking the time to gratefully drink some water Koro-Sensei offered me, I control my breathing, and try to get my heartrate down.

That was fun!

Thay was the first time I really exerted myself in this world, and it was such a 𝘳𝘶𝘴𝘩!

The five minutes felt like hours with how excited I was getting myself for the spar.

Until finally.

"Brat, it's time for the next test-

With that I was led into a raised ring with Tameki standing opposite me.

"-The test is to survive 3 minutes against Tameki, start after you make the seal of confrontation."

No one spoke after that, and despite my best efforts, I couldn't keep the smile from leaking onto my face, and I think it must have unsettled Tameki a bit, because I saw him shifting uncomfortably before offering his fingers, I mirrored the sentiment, and then he was upon me.

Tameki moved far faster than I was ready for, and threw a right hook straight at my face, barely managing to dodge backwards, mostly out of instinct, i feel my smile start to split my face as adrenaline the likes of which I've never felt before courses through my veins '𝘢𝘩𝘯~ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨!'.

Keeping my momentum I fall backwards into a handstand, only instead if lifting my feet up, I kick out instead, pushing off my hands at the same time and I suppose he wasn't expecting that because it connected right on his stomach, sending him stumbling back a few steps.

Not wanting to give him any time to collect himself I twist until my feet are back on the ground, and this time it was 𝘪 who was upon 𝘩𝘪𝘮.

Using my small hight to my advantage, I feint a jump, as if wanting to repay the favour by going for the face, only instead I slide between his legs, in a move that only worked because I'm so small and immediately I am up and swinging at his back.

Tameki manages to spin around just in time to block with his forearm, but I don't let up on the pressure, the height difference makes it awkward for him to hit me, but I can strike his stomach and legs just fine, I aim for the general areas where I know nerve clusters are and I keep up the pressure.

I strike for his stomach again getting blocked, but then i punch out with my other arm to the knee, he takes a step back to avoid it and responds by sending the same knee back at me which I push to the side with my arm so it goes wide.

Eventually, I lose myself to the rhythm.

𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙠𝙚, 𝙙𝙤𝙙𝙜𝙚.

𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙠𝙚, 𝙙𝙤𝙙𝙜𝙚.

Time loses all meaning as the thrill of the fight overtakes me, until Takemi manages to grab my arm.

I think someone is saying something, but I can't hear it, I use Tameki's hold on my arm as leverage to launch myself for the first time at his head, where I do a quick rotation to slam the heel of my boot right into his temple, whereupon he drops like a sack of rice, me falling with him,

But I'm on my feet almost as soon as I hit the ground blood pounding in my ears as I wait for the next strike.

Only nothing comes, and after a moment the adrenaline starts to clear, and my vision starts to clear 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵?

After a moment I look around, Tameki is on the ground, and Koro-Sensei and Tamaki are looking at me like I'm a feral cat or something, I take a moment, noticing how hard I'm breathing, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘪 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥?

I take a moment, feeling the adrenaline fade, and the pain of soon to be bruises spring up before facing my two examiners still standing,

"*Pant* so *Pant* next test?"

*Sigh* *Sigh* *Groan*

oh look he's waking up, that's nice. At this point Tamaki just jooks resigned and Koro-Sensei is looking at me with some emotions I don't recognise.

"Whatever you little monster, let's just get this over with, the fire show from the obstacle course was enough to be C-Rank so all that's left is the genjutsu test, I am going to put you in a genjutsu, you just need to break out of it."

Seems easy enough, his piece said, Tamaki starts staring at me with a look of consternation on his face, and I think I feel some chakra trying to enter my system, but it just gets caught up in the current and doesn't even reach my main pool, which now that I'm looking at it is still rather depleted from that fire I made.

For a long minute, nothing really happens, except for Tamaki's face becoming more and more constipated looking, and Tameki looking more and more smug, presumably that someone else seems to be suffering too.

Eventually however Tamaki seems to reach a breaking point of sorts.

"GAH! I give up! I can't even put the little monster in a genjutsu!"

After his outburst Koro-Sensei speaks up for the first time since the tests started, sounding lightly defeated.

"Well, Haruno-san congratulations, you've passed, with flying colours at that...

He trails of at the end, and in my excitement at 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 being an official murder wizard, I don't catch his next muttered words.

"two years and I really don't know you at all do I?"

Before I head home with my fancy new headband, I make sure to ask about joining ANBU, and am told to just come back to the same class, same time tomorrow.

I'm looking forward to the future even more now!

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A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!

EXITEMENT! ADRENALINE! WOOOOOOO!!!!

so yeah, Hanabira is a sociopath, so its a rare occasion that he feels anything at all, and even then the most intense thing hes ever felt is amusement, so he has no experience whatsover with intense emotions, and thus has no resistance to them, meaning adrenalin is to him a high greather than every emotion he has ever known combined.

in other words hes an adrenalin junkie