A Knight's Lilies

“In the years following the fall of Basilius Primus Axion Tassius, the Lucurian Sultanate and many of the beast folk from the ‘Land of Many Tribes’ formed a temporary alliance and led countless incursions into former union territories. These assaults, followed by the massive civil war that broke out led directly to the deaths of all of Tassius’s children and thus the splintering of what little unity remained in the First Nautican Union, causing what many of humanity’s historians to label ‘The Splintering’ “

- Jorvik Ekrund, Potomian Traveling Court Scholar, “Birth of a New Union” Chapter 13: Tassian’s Fall

The screams, pain, and cries reverberated in her head. She could see the church as the door came tumbling down, the people fleeing in terror and strange robed man bandying around a weapon. Then came the blood and death as she felt an agonizing pain as something impaled her.

Her eyes shot open and the first thing she felt was fuzzy, everything was so fuzzy. She scratched at her head and grumbled angrily until the pounding in her head finally settled down. Taking advantage of the calm she looked around her, warm rays of sunlight shone through the forest canopy as a chill breeze made her shiver. Around her a languid if relaxing forest swayed to the rhythm of the wind. Animals screeched and roared as birds chirped and sang their birdsong. The light colored everything in a lovely golden hue as her eyes danced around at the strange sights.

As her feet tickled strangely she found herself barefoot and on top of an intricately carved stone dais. Inlays and countless little openings had been cut into it to direct the flow of something. What that something was, she did not know. Around the dais sanguine and purple robes lay flaccidly on the ground, the cloth occasionally moving to scatter small piles of ash. Soot marks and charred grass indicated something had brought her here, but that left only questions as she wondered why here? Another gust of wind blew past and the chill bit deep at her, the too small nightgown doing nothing to protect her skin. But strangely, she felt surprisingly warm on the inside. The chill was unable to dig any deeper.

Sighing, she hopped off the dais and felt a small tingle as it made contact with the grass, the little blades like a soft brush against her skin. Yet, after taking a few steps, she felt a gnawing feeling overtake her, a growing sense of discomfort as pressure piled onto her, weighing her down with every step. Dissatisfied and uncomfortable, she made her way to the stream and scooped in a mouthful of water, and a new sensation made itself known to her. A pleasurable sensation rocked her body as the dryness in her throat was finally exposed to liquid, and without a care she greedily scooped a few more mouthfuls of water.

With a satisfied harrumph she stood back up and danced merrily around the stream, the sense of freedom feeling so fresh and new. But once again, the billowing pressure and sense of discomfort refused to leave her, hanging around her head as something else bothered her. A small gurgle escaped from her stomach and she looked around for food.

Seeing naught but leaves and the piles of ash, she disappointedly turned her attention to the forest. Looking into the tree line she hoped a meal would simply present itself to feed her, but after a minute of tense waiting she let loose a disappointed sigh. With no other possibility considered she trudged begrudgingly into the brush, her foot kicking up soil and dirt and countless small critters likely fled at her monstrous approach.

The golden radiant rays of sunshine brought forth a calming warmth, but even she could tell they were getting weaker, the light just a bit softer than before. Another gurgle interrupted her search and she continued trudging through the forest, the occasional deer or other large herbivore giving her a look before they trotted off. Her luck finally came to fruition after following a lazy looking horse that seemed to not have a care in the world, looking at her to assess if she was a threat before deeming her unworthy to even think about. Thinking she had made a friend she drew closer only for it to gallop away in fright. Panicked, she followed the horse’s chaotic trail and eventually ended up in a small glade, currently occupied by a scurry of squirrels that also scattered upon her arrival.

A few seemed ready to fight to the death to defend their territory, but again, no matter how eager they seemed to fight, the moment she closed the distance, they scattered in fright. Worried, but also assuming that it was only that she was far larger, she wandered over to the tree where the crowd was earlier and spied a multitude of berries, fallen or otherwise, that looked immensely appetising. Considering that the squirrels were, as far as she was concerned, not all dead, she assumed they were edible and plucked a few off the ground to try.

Her tongue curled at the tart, tangy and bitter flavors that popped forth from the black looking berries, the hint of sweetness barely allowing her to swallow a mouthful. But greed and necessity thought otherwise, and as her stomach sensed the food, it urged for more. Reluctantly and now craving a little more of the tart and bitterness, she looked up to the tree and began plucking more and more berries. A thrilling dance of balancing the flavor palette and satiating her hunger began as she devoured everything she found.

Her face was covered with berry juices when a silent stomping brought her consumption to a quick halt. Slowly turning around she found herself staring at a bear. Brown fuzzy fur as it looked at her, no, the berries, hungrily. Swallowing the last mouthful she quickly gulped down the juices and tried to back away, the lumbering creature advancing cautiously as it eyed its competitor. But, despite being more than twice her size and perhaps even capable of severing her limb from limb, it stepped to about ten odd paces before it froze.

Taking it as a good sign she grabbed a handful of berries and placed them down as an offering, prompting the creature to close the distance. However, in a bizarre twist, it whimpered pathetically and backed away. Curious, she took another step closer and it gave out a sad roar and lumbered away, crashing through the underbrush as it fled. Offended, she gave herself a few sniffs, and upon finding nothing too offensive, she returned to eating more berries. But the experience soured the taste, and what little joy and fulfilment she gained from eating them earlier vanished as they became nothing but tasteless morsels.

A little more peeved than before, she pulled herself away from the berry tree, removed a handful of offerings and snaked her way along the bear’s path. Following the trail of destruction, she walked and walked until finally the light from the sun grew weary, and the faint glow of the stars above began to shine through. A sense of ease rushed over her and in the approaching dark she found a calm serenity not present during the warmth of the day. The pressure too that resided over her seemed to subside and as she shuffled along the bear’s trail she debated eating the berries she had stuffed in her nightgown’s pocket but decided otherwise.

The journey had taken most of the daylight hours but she found it eventually. Beyond a row of trees, a small clearing with a woodland cave lay hidden by foliage, perhaps a bit more hesitant now, she suddenly felt that providing an offering to a bear might not be the best idea. But regret was not something she could really feel, or was it?

“Ah!” She exclaimed out loud.

Looking around she stumbled out of the foliage and into the clearing. She had heard it, or at least heard something in her head, that much she was certain. But try as she might she could find no speaker, no source of the sound. Unless it was the bear.

Spinning around in a fright she did not find the bear or the voice. But it does sound familiar. There it was again, but this time she controlled it and her mind began churning as the connections began to manifest within her. I…I can hear myself think! Surprised and intrigued, she found herself giggling at the thought. I can think about things! Like trees, food, and bears! Bears? Bear!

Her giggling ground to a halt as she took sight of the lumbering shadow behind her, the faint moist scent of a snout as warm air tickled the back of her neck. It sure isn’t afraid anymore. On one hand she was glad she no longer repulsed the bear, on the other the bear was right next to her. Seeing no other option she carefully pulled the berries out of her gown pocket, hoping the creature would not simply snack on her instead. Perhaps surprised, or just unamused by this strange display, it leaned down and tasted a berry without bothering her. One turned to two and soon the handful had quickly been consumed.

Looking at the brown creature, it seemed not exactly satisfied but no longer outwardly hostile. Feeling a little lonely, she hesitantly reached out and brushed her hand gently against the creature’s head. Unsure of how to act it simply stared at her as she then moved to give it a satisfying scritch in the head. Everyone loves getting scratches in the head. Now fully certain she wasn’t a threat, it leaned down and she begun petting, scratching and rubbing the bear. The coarse and soft layers of fur were deceptively addictive to her hands and she managed to bring out a smile as the creature relaxed from the pampering. Yes, she thought to herself, this is good.

So it was that her routine for the next few days was established. Return to the dais near the brook for water, find more berry bushes and eat ravenously for the day, go to the bear cave at night and spend time with her new fuzzy companion, making sure to leave before dawn. It was a simple, happy routine, as far as she was concerned. Still, in the time alone, her mind was not idle and often found her mood dropping dangerously low.

There was the feeling that something was amiss, that something was bearing down on her and leaving her feeling empty. Then there was the question of where she was. With not much help from her fuzzy compatriot all she knew was that she was in a forest. If she could figure out where she was, perhaps then, she could answer more important question of, who am I?

She believed she could find the answer. Just like how she befriended the bear, it would take time. She wasn’t born and raised in the forest that much was certain. My nightgown alone seems so out of place, that I was probably brought here unwillingly. But try as she might, no matter how thoroughly she searched the area around the brook, she could find no other evidence of sapient life besides the discarded robes. Just more signs that someone at some point performed a ritual. Yet every time she began exploring the recesses of her mind, it led to a low buzzing that irritated her until she actively thought about something else. Accepting that certain things would elude her in the new normal, she was still a little annoyed that she remembered nothing, that she didn’t know who she was.

Regardless, she had her routine, and despite her reservations that was enough. She was well hydrated, and fed, if a little stinky. Though Big Fuzz didn’t seem to mind and though she had never intruded further upon his domain she was certain she was a welcome guest.

This day started off no different, wrapped in a red robe today, the purple ones had all been dirtied, she bathed herself somewhat in the stream and then set off to tree five. It was embarrassing but on the second day she could recall going back to the first tree only to realise that she had in fact, consumed almost all the berries and that they, in fact, take time to grow back. Thus she thought nothing of it when her mood suddenly lifted, as if someone had taken the pressure off her back.

Truth

She jumped in fright from the guttural voice that rang out loud in her head. She stood still and waited, the voice did not sound like her own, nor did it sound like her thinking voice. Frightened, she let out a series of distressed yelps and squeaks as she tried to seek out where the interloper was. But seeing nothing nor hearing anything else, she rapidly continued on her path.

Sprinting her way to the tree, she ignored what fauna was crowded around it and messily gobbled away, scaring the poor creatures as her own presence overwhelmed them. A sense of impending doom loomed over her and with every bite she grew more and more nervous. Having consumed a copious amount of berries and an unfortunate leaf that made her gag, she quickly stuffed a handful in her nightgown and turned the red robe into a small bag for berries. Scampering back to the brook she nervously retraced her steps with one eye turned to the woods, but no new sounds echoed within her.

Following the trail back to Big Fuzz she watched as the light shone brighter today, more fierce and valiant and worried about the bear’s reaction. Surely this offering would be enough?

The Fated Guide

“Ahhh!” She screamed and clutched at her head. The guttural voice reverberated within her.

In her panic she stumbled and dropped the robe filled with berries, the little oblong and rounded orbs rolling around on the ground. Nooo! The berries!

Scrambling to pick up the lost goods she temporarily ignored the pressing issue of the mystery voice and felt a sense of annoyance wash over her. Almost as if something was judging her reactions. Shaking off the discomfort she recovered what little she could and sat unmoving, disappointed by what remained. Begrudgingly she made her way towards the clearing and found Big Fuzz.

But unlike their usual greeting of him staring at her lazily he was up on his legs, growling aggressively at her. Worried, she quickly put the robe down and added her own handfuls from her pockets onto the berry pile. As the bear drew closer it tampered down and a small sigh of relief escaped from her lips. Yet her fears returned just as quickly when it swatted the berry pile away and advanced at her. Wha-why is he so angry? What did I do?

Backing away slowly she held her hands up, gesturing for the bear to do what it wanted and that she was leaving. But it kept pursuing. Walking further back the bear followed her and with a roar it charged at her.

Yelping in fright she dashed haphazardly throughout the forest, smashing in and through branches and brushes as the bear rumbled close behind. Pivoting sharply past a few trees she could hear the sickening crack of wood as Big Fuzz rammed into them, failing to make the sharp turn. An angry roar quickly followed as he continued the chase and she quickly sprinted past another copse of trees before slamming head first into a thick trunk.

Crying out in pain she whimpered on the ground and could hear the heavy lumbering steps as Big Fuzz drew closer. Why? Why are you so angry? Wincing from the pain she clenched her eyes shut and only opened them when the stomping ground to a halt next to her. The heavy breathing from Big Fuzz tickled warmly over her face and she shivered at the sight of his vicious teeth barred against her. With bated breath she met his angry eyes and as he drew closer, he seemed to snap at something above her head. Confused, she looked upwards to find nothing and when she reached up to give Big Fuzz a little reassuring pat, he turned away and left.

Staring at the bear’s rump as it left, she felt a small pang of pain cross her heart and felt a little emptier on the inside. Waiting for another moment or two she heard the chirping of animals and the cracking of more branches in the distance. Staring up to the canopy she watched as a small squirrel looked down at her before fleeing. A soft breeze blew its way across the forest floor and once more, her skin grew unnaturally cold and she shivered. Pushing herself up she sat languidly against the tree and crawled over to a nearby log. Why me? Why does everything hate me?

Despondent she sat and stared blankly into the distance, the pressure on her shoulders growing heavier than ever and broke into a small sob. She was so lost, so confused, with no reason to be here or no idea who she was. She had fun, she enjoyed herself here but the sense of emptiness always gnawed at her, always clawed at the edges of her mind. Tired, cold and depressed she allowed herself a moment of raw emotion to take over and began crying.