A Depressed Kendo Player Possesses a Reckless Aristocrat

Spring Flowers (5)

And so, time passed again.

Leaving behind the days when we inscribed the word “hope” in our hearts, one by one.

To keep the promise I made with my people, I lived each day busily.

-I promise.

-I’ll never… leave again.

-I won’t try to run away anymore… I’ll try to live tenaciously…

A resolution not to flee from a dark life.

The start of it, was facing the mistakes I had committed in the past.

‘I am sorry for everything.’

For the past few days, the words of apology were always on my lips.

I sought out each and every servant I had harmed, offering a sincere apology.

If necessary, I did not hesitate to kneel.

To show that I was different from yesterday.

To let them know I had returned to the boy from the past, remaining in the depths of their memories.

I lived each day diligently.

Wandering around the mansion, I helped the servants with their work.

Laundry, cleaning, meal prep, dishes…

Not exactly the kind of tasks a duke’s eldest son should be doing, but I didn’t care at all.

If I hesitated in the face of something like this,

It would feel as if my atonement to you all was as light as a feather.

I was on my way to reclaiming the time I’d lost.

-D-Young Master… you really don’t have to do this much.

-We feel bad for it… the past is in the past now.

-That’s right, Young Master. You should rest a bit. You’ve been working so hard lately.

Thankfully, perhaps my sincerity had gotten through.

The servants, who had been wary and stiff with me at first, were slowly starting to open up to me.

As quickly as I spent each busy day, time also flew by like the wind.

That passing time had now reached the point of being just about two weeks away from the academy’s reopening.

January, gradually moving toward its end.

Now, with the month’s conclusion so close at hand, I was spending time with my precious people.

“So, then Oppa, you know… he got first place in the academy practice spar…!”

“Hahaha… Our young master?”

“I’m telling you, old sir!”

“Raiden at the academy… Hmmm, that’s unexpected.”

A space filled with warm tenderness.

Ariel had the old sir and my father sitting on the sofa as they chatted away.

A soft hue emanating from the fireplace painted the surroundings.

It was a peaceful scene.

I leaned against the window and took in the tranquil tableau.

Submerged in the gentle ripples of time, I sipped the tea the old sir had poured.

While I savored that brief moment of calm,

Lucy’s voice, from where she’d taken a seat beside me, reached my ear.

“I feel like I’m… imposing a little bit.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I feel like I’m interrupting this harmonious family time…”

A bitter smile played on Lucy’s lips.

His sea-blue eyes held a curious, almost wary watchfulness.

It seemed his continued stay in the mansion, for several weeks now, was weighing on him.

‘He really doesn’t have to…’

The reason Lucy remained in the mansion was, from the start, because of me.

I had held onto her, worried about the girl who hadn’t fully escaped the memories of ‘that day’.

I gave a bitter smile.

It felt like I had placed an unnecessary burden on her.

“Among those in the mansion, none are uncomfortable with Your Highness.”

“Still…”

“Rather, I am joyous. That Your Highness would remain for my sake.”

It was a truth, devoid of falsehood.

Lucy being tethered to the mansion was also for my benefit.

I, too, was still living in sorrow.

Even if one dreams of a forest, the beginning always springs from a small seedling.

The happiness I vowed for myself was still but a seedling.

And that was only natural.

After having lived like a wreck, locked away in obsession and loneliness for so long.

It was too soon to even speak of happiness.

‘…I’m still the same.’

I was still tormented by nightmares.

Still suffering from auditory and visual hallucinations.

Still living by relying on the smoke of the Deathly Grass.

That is why I needed Lucy.

I needed more people, more warmth, more love.

“Because Your Highness has stayed… each of my days is filled with a more dazzling light.”

I set down the glass I held and quietly took the girl’s hand.

Soft skin grazed my fingertips.

I laced my fingers with hers, and a clumsy smile touched my lips.

“I am eternally grateful, my lord.”

I offer a simple, quiet thank you.

Lucy stares at me blankly for a moment, then lowers her head abruptly.

“Raiden is… how should I put it, um, dan-dangerous…”

Lucy murmurs those strange words in a hazy voice.

For some reason, the girl’s ears are flushed red.

What on earth does she mean by dangerous?

I tilt my head, pondering, but before I can ask, a call interrupts.

“Young Master.”

Turning, I see Rachel holding a tray.

She approaches with composed steps and, with gentle movements, refills our teacups.

“Wow…”

Lucy gulps down a mouthful of tea as if her throat were parched, then lets out a sigh of admiration.

“Rachel’s tea ceremony skills seem to get better with each day…”

“That’s very flattering.”

“It’s true. She’s just as good as any imperial court lady.”

Lucy’s eyes gleam with pure light as she stares at the girl.

Rachel smiles shyly at the attention.

I, who had been quietly listening to their conversation, tap the seat beside me and open my mouth.

“Rachel, stay with us. Put the tray down.”

“Yes, Young Master.”

We stood together, chatting idly.

“It feels like summer vacation is ending already… time sure flies.”

“Yeah… with so many things happening, it feels like it passed by in the blink of an eye.”

“How have you been lately, Raiden? Nightmares or hallucinations…”

“They’re… still there. These things don’t usually get better easily…”

“I guess not…?”

“Hmm…”

The two girls’ faces darken at my words.

I respond to their reactions with a faint smile, speaking in a gentle tone.

“But please don’t worry. It is getting better… little by little, for sure.”

“Really…?”

“Really…?”

“Didn’t I tell you? That I wouldn’t tell any more lies.”

I’m still living with this fever rash.

But, even so.

I pulled up the corners of my mouth, as if to say I was alright.

With this meager smile, I hoped that those standing before me would be a little relieved.

“It’ll get better and better from now on.”

I believe that.

I want to believe it.

I’m trying to believe it.

“Everything will be alright, Master.”

“Yeah… it’ll all be alright, Raiden.”

“Of course, it has to be.”

Rachel, who waited for me, unchanging, while I was gone.

Ariel, who hugged me tight when I returned.

Lucy, who, despite all the disappointments I caused, ultimately accepted me.

My father and Gilbert, who made me realize I could still be loved.

For them, who had grabbed my hand as I was losing my balance and staggering, I had to move toward hope.

That was the only way I could repay them, make amends.

It would be the best, the greatest way to express my gratitude to my mother, who left my existence in this world.

“……”

I organized the thoughts flashing through my head.

And then, quietly, I reached out both hands, taking the hands of the two girls by my side.

“Master…?”

“Raiden…?”

The warmth that dyed my palms tenderly.

The heat from the teacup I had been holding until just now paled in comparison, their hands were that warm.

A fuzzy feeling swirled around me.

I savored it, and quietly spoke.

“Thank you, both of you.”

“Hehe… haven’t you been saying ‘thank you’ a bit too often lately?”

“Is that so?”

At the bright question, I turned my gaze away with an awkward smile.

As I fidgeted with the small flames held in my hand, recent memories vividly surged.

-So… will you stay by my side, from now on as well?

-Will you give me a chance…?

To Rachel.

-I’ve caused you much pain, but if you allow it…

-I intend to stay by your side.

To Lucy.

I asked for permission to remain by your sides, and you both nodded without a hint of hesitation.

Perhaps it was that one word of response that saved me.

Because you were there.

I can stand in this warm scenery now.

‘Given this… how can I not say thank you.’

I mumbled, a lukewarm feeling washing over me.

Just then, as a moment of silence swept by.

Ariel, who had been sitting on the sofa, suddenly jumped to her feet as if she had discovered something.

“Whoa…!”

The girl’s footsteps quickly approached the window.

“It’s snowing! It’s snowing!”

Following the pure joy, I looked out the window.

A view of pure white snowflakes fluttering down from the dark sky came into sight.

The first snow of this winter.

The fragrance of the season truly arrived unexpectedly.

I offered up a detached impression, taking the pure white dust into my eyes.

“Oppa, let’s go outside tomorrow! I want to see the snow for the first time in ages!”

Ariel directed eyes full of interest towards me.

Gazing at the sparkling red eyes, I wore a brief, listless smile, and then nodded.

“Yeah… let’s do it. I had somewhere to go anyway.”

“Somewhere to go…? Where’s that?”

“Somewhere you know too.”

Ariel tilted her head, puzzled by the vague answer.

I chuckled for a moment at her cute expression, then turned my gaze back to the window, fixated.

Clouds filled the night sky.

Patches of blue moonlight peeked through the scattering snowflakes.

Gazing at the snowflakes dancing under the soft glow, I savored small thoughts.