A Bond Beyond Blood

[REWRITE] Cowardice



"Well... shit."

Time passed in an instant, and soon Chiori would be coming home. My heart still didn't calm down, as I looked vacantly out the window dreading the moment I'd catch sight of her.

My nerves felt cold as ice thinking about how I should face her. The idea of accepting her confession head on feels unreal. Coming to terms with it is much easier said than done.

We've been close before undeniably, which could already be considered somewhat weird, but in such a sense it could be kept to just having strange thoughts about the situation, whether from us or from the outside. The actions in question were still mundane. Actually crossing the line however, becoming a couple... it would undeniably be abnormal, no matter how much leeway is given.

A part of me does want to at least give it a shot. I don't hate the idea of it. Given how serious she is about it, and how I do like her back, she at least should deserve a shot. Denying it just to pretend to be 'normal' is idiotic. Nor am I a saint, virtue and moral highgrounds are not a thing I'm highly concerned with in my day to day life.

Yet I'm not so confident that just because I have some unsorted feelings towards her that I should immediately jump into being an outright deviant. Just say fuck it all and date my sister for all the people I know to see. Give my dad a heart attack, why not? fuck him and fuck everyone else.

Well, not literally because in that case I'd be fucking my sister instead.

It's ridiculous even thinking about doing such a thing.

Feeling like my thoughts going in circles would lead me nowhere, I decided to look at the scheduled homework online to at the very least distract myself from it for a while.

For a while I blankly stared at the agenda, occasionally snapping out of it to actually get my textbooks out. Trying to prepare in advance, I read through which questions should be done by what day of the week for the next 10 days and noted them.

After which I sent a text to Kiyomi.

"36-41 for biology class this friday, oral exam for traditional literature on tuesday."

While our deal was over, she would probably whine to me if I didn't inform her of our upcoming schedule.

Despite me not liking her much on a personal level, at the very least dealing with her is a lot easier than trying to sort out my situation.

Though as I was figuring out my schedule, downstairs I heard the sound of someone entering.

"Onii-chan, I'm home."

Whether I wanted to or not, I had to face her one way or the other.

 

 

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