Slime Slime Slime

"...And thus we remember Yaru, beloved of Jom and parent of two, as well as parent to all."

Phylu cleared his throat, taking a sip of his water. He had gotten through twenty-six of the deceased on his list, after all. Everyone know who the twenty-seventh and final name would be. Glancing around herself, Aono could see that many had tears on their faces, but many, including some of those who had cried, had sad smiles as they remembered the good times with the deceased.

Poor Lim had finally stopped sobbing after over ten minutes of grieving the death of his son. Having never been a parent, Aono could only feel for him and the others who had lost children as much as she could. It was definitely sad to outlive your own child, she reflected. After all a major hope of most of the parents she'd spoken to was that their children would have a good future even after the parents themselves had departed into the land of the dead.

But then Phlyu's next words brought Aono out of those thoughts. "And now we will remember Thoy, not least for what she did to ensure that more names wouldn't be on this list. I knew her as an ornery but kind woman. I remember many occasions on which I saw her carrying something heavy and saying to everyone that tried to help her, 'I might be an old wreck, but I still have strength in those ancient bones.' Many time she'd simply take up something heavy for someone else, even. Then she'd be huffing after a short while and give the burden to someone else for a while before taking it back up once she had recovered."

He shook his head. "That was the kind of woman she was. Both proud and practical." He raised his flipper to select the next person to speak. "Sardu, you may speak."

Sardu stood, her spiky red hair still standing out in the crowd. "She had a sense of humor. Would always laugh when I flirted with her and tell me I should get at least a half century older before trying that." A pause. "She was basically this really hot old badass. She also was a big help to me both as a Guardian and a monster hunter, always giving me tips from her many years of experience fighting monsters."

"Thanks for the... memorable eulogy of her. Kilnu, you next."

Kilnu stood. Like other eulogies given by him, this was brief. "She was a good teacher and taught everything I know about fighting monsters. May she be known in the land of the dead as one who attained glory." He sat down.

A few others spoke as Aono found her sight blurring. Then she heard her name being called and rose. "Thoy... was a dear friend. Above all that was what she was to me. She, uh, she was always happy to watch my slimes for me and she was generous when I needed clothes. She, um... she was a great friend, okay? I suppose she went out the way she was always saying she wanted, a big heroic death."

With that, Aono sat down, wiping away the tears that had came to her face. A lot of the people that stood up after that thanked Thoy for saving the community.

Remarkably, the last person to stand up was Unnamed, the Folk shadeling that had been found wandering confused amid a bunch of Wild shadelings after the swarm battle. They hadn't yet come up with a name for themselves, opting to go by Unnamed for now. "Um. I never knew this Thoy person, but she seemed like a swell person? In a way, I feel thankful to her. I think it was fear at seeing so many others like me get fried that made me turn from a monster into Folk. So without that I'd still be a mindless monster? I suppose I'm also sorry? For all I did as a monster. And thankful people have been basically... understanding?"

Phylu waved an flipper. "What someone did as a monster cannot be held against them. Likewise creatures that once were monsters. As a monster, you were not yourself as you are now."

The former monster looked thoughtful. "Mm. It's just... confusing? But I've said my piece. I'll sit down."

"You'll adjust," Phylu said kindly.

And then it was time for the desires of the departed to be known.

Phylu cleared his throat again. "Now, unlike many on that tragic evening, Thoy was fully prepared for her own death. As such, she left very clear instructions with me and regularly updated them. For the matters of her remains, ahem, she wished for her remains to be part of an offering to HERO whose patronage she had long ago earned during her monster hunting days. But since there are no remains, we will proceed to the matter of memorializing her. Quote, 'Just a grave plague or something will do, but you can just do whatever you like.'"

"Someone should build a statue of her," a voice in the crowd said.

At that, Phylu raised a flipper to make a slashing shushing motion. "We will discuss such matters later. Now continuing onward to her desires for her belongings."

"She wished for her house and its furniture to be given to whoever the community determines to need them. For her belongings, she divided them into a few items to be sent to her siblings' descendants and a majority of items to be donated to the community pool. Ah, apparently Jouu gets that hat she really liked. As for the, ahem, quote 'fucking big pile of cash under my bed', she specified certain persons in need it would go toward aiding.

"Firstly, to Aono as much money as she needs to pay off her debts. Ahem, her words to you are 'Don't think of turning down a dead woman.' Now, how much is your debt?"

Aono's head was full of shock. Apparently Thoy had been completely serious about that. But she managed to rouse herself enough to give a quote of the sum of her debts. "But I'm fine not getting the whole thing covered," she said.

Phylu waved a flipper. "That isn't even a tenth of the sum of wealth we found under her bed."

"Oh," Aono could only reply, "I suppose it's like she said. I can't turn down her final wishes."

The walrus nodded. "Trust me, she was very clear on this point. Now on to the rest, and it's a long list..."

After what felt like Thoy solving the financial woes of half the community, the litany of recipients came to an end with Yuin, a flame folk Aono barely knew, standing up and saying, "Um, I already bought a wagon today. Oh... that would be, um, after her death wouldn't it..."

"Very well," Phylu said, "Unless you have any other needs, all the rest will go into the community funds to be used as we determine fit."

"No, it's fine," Yuin said as she sat back down, settling her flaming tentacles underneath herself.

"And thus we remember Thoy, who survived a truly exceptional 267 years before finally finding the worthy death she sought." With that, Phylu concluded the memorial ceremony.

"Well." Tamu sighed. "I suppose Thoy got to helping you pay your debt before I did. I was saving up for that, too. I'm so sorry for running off and leaving you with all that."

Aono waved her hand, dismissing the notion. "No, it's fine. It's clear you weren't into it. I was upset at the time, but it's not like you didn't contribute your share of money and effort before you quit. If anything, I should've been the one giving you money, to buy out your stake."

"But you were so upset..." Tamu said hesitantly.

"Yes, because it was sudden and you wanted me to start up yet another new thing when I wanted to keep going with the slime farm." Aono sighed. "Thanks for the apology. I do think you've matured some now that you've found something you like doing and settled down into it."

Tamu looked thoughtful. "Don't really feel like I've matured. All I'm doing is what I find fun. I enjoy creating what odds and ends folks around here need. Fixing stuff too. Just so many different challenges."

Aono just smiled. "You finally started up something and stuck to it. You've been working hard at it, too. I'm happy for you, really. That money you saved up, you should use it to expand your business."

"Hmm," Tamu said, "There were some tools and other things I felt like I could use. I suppose I'll have to make up my own business plan..."

"I just hope the Empire doesn't complicate all this." Aono crossed her arms with a slight frown. "They could throw all kinds of wrinkles into things."

"And so the final step of the economical transition will be the near complete elimination of money." Ayu, the ant bureaucrat that the Empire had sent, said as she put up the next set of illustrations, displaying them on the community hall's stands. "At that stage, money will only be used to facilitate trade with those outside the Empire."

As everyone stared in stunned silence, Ayu continued, "Every citizen is guaranteed the basic necessities. Food. Housing. Clothing. Hygiene products. And so on, you'll see the full list here. Every one of you is also guaranteed freely available schooling, healing, and a steady supply of mana gems."

She flipped to another set of illustrations, of adults and children hard at study. "Adults will be able to avail themselves of the various courses that will become available to you, while children will be required to go to school. A few teachers with levels in educational classes will be sent here to facilitate that. We will do everything we can do to help you get your classes and early levels. We will also help with class changes for those wishing to change their careers.

At this point, Ayu held up a tiny azure emblem in a diamond shape. "Everyone that contributes to the Empire in any way, including supplying necessities, luxuries, services, providing entertainment, raising children, or even just simple acts of kindness will earn Azure points which can be redeemed for luxuries. Those will be recorded upon those emblems which you will soulbind to yourself. Don't worry, those are carefully designed to have the minimal possible burden upon your souls. That's why they're so small and so limited in their functions. All they do is record contributions. We will also use them to identify you as Azure citizens."

Aono stared. Soulbinding items was not something done lightly. It would render the object impossible to steal, lose, or tamper with, but it would also place a burden upon one's soul. The larger and more weighty the object, the heavier the burden, so most people only did it for small objects. Not only that, but removing a soulbind would effectively destroy the object.

A familiar squirrel stood up. "What the fuck!" yelled Gamu, "This is weird as chaos!"

"This is how the Azure Empire does things," Ayu stated passionately, "And how we have succeeded and prospered as much as we have. By guaranteeing everyone what they need to survive and prosper, we are able to focus on what matters to us and working more directly toward bettering others' lives. By educating everyone, we are improved in our ability to make life better for others. By rewarding contributions and kindness, we encourage ourselves to do such acts. In the end, the Empire can only exist because of its citizens. We create a society where everyone exists to help everyone. This is the true meaning of the saying 'Glory to the Empire and its citizens!'"

Gamu snorted. "You don't believe that, do you?"

At this point, Ayu smiled. "You will understand in time that we are completely sincere. You will also understand the love we feel for everyone, and I do mean everyone without exception. In time, maybe you will feel that love, too."

"Um. But don't you conquer people?" Aiio's voice was full of nervousness as they asked that question.

"Yes, sadly, that is often necessary to bring our love to others." The bureaucrat sighed. "If only we could achieve our goals solely through communication and kindness."

At this point, it seemed like no one was sure what to say to such a statement. Then the infamous Oddball Huju, a mouse with bulging eyes, started waving rapidly. "You're the Empress's puppets!" he yelled accusingly, "She hollowed out all your souls and replaced them!"

Ayu just chuckled. "Quite a remarkable theory, but this creed predates the Empress by three centuries. In the end, she is a product of the Azure Way, not the creator of it. She was raised, like every one of us, to be an embodiment of love. We're just a bunch of Folk seeking to improve the world. Nothing more than that."

All this was quite peculiar, Aono pondered, but there was a more practical concern to focus on. Raising her hand, she asked, "So this transition, how can we best prepare for it?"

"Ah, yes, let's go over that now. Let's start off with this list of steps..." Smiling, Ayu put up some more illustrations.

In the end, no matter how intensely Aono listened, she couldn't shake the feeling of unease in her heart.