Royal Gold Magistrate

Fang Zheng felt things weren’t right and quickly looked towards the stage.

He saw that Legend of the White Snake was already nearing its end.

Fahai, Xu Xian, and Bai Suzhen were all there… but this Fahai’s getup was a bit unexpected.

He was dressed surprisingly flamboyantly, with a string of large gold beads around his neck, baring his chest. And… he was even embracing Bai Suzhen?

Fang Zheng’s eyes went wide.

Bai Suzhen was still vividly reciting her lines, “Xu Xian! You and I have affinity but no fate… Let’s just part ways!”

Fahai looked at Xu Xian lying on the ground and sneered, “Layman, you cannot force things. Affinity rises and falls, affinity is born and extinguished, affinity gathers and scatters. Only by being with me can Suzhen find true happiness.”

Xu Xian lay on the ground in despair, watching the affectionate couple. He was tongue-tied, unable to speak. This dog man and snake before his eyes kept flaunting their love.

Fahai lifted Bai Suzhen’s chin and said with deep affection, “Originally this old monk thought he would devote himself wholly to Buddha in this life. Only after meeting you did I realize, I like you so much, so much that I can even give up everything for you.”

Bai Suzhen coyly said, “Me too, me too. No, I like you even more.”

“You can’t possibly like me more, because I’m already full of love for you.”

“If you’re full, then my love will overflow.”

In the end, Xu Xian let out a desperate cry, “Suzhen! We still have a son! If you follow this bald donkey, what will happen to our child? When Shilin grows up, how will he face people? Do you want him to acknowledge a thief as his father and call him Dad?”

Bai Suzhen’s expression appeared sorrowful as she replied, “Xu Xian, you and Fahai are both people who love me. You’ve both had the most intimate relationship with me. I’m deeply moved that you both cherish and love me so much.”

“But from now on, please don’t say things like who the child should call Dad. Can you bury this expectation and love for the child deep in your heart, and transform your open objections into secret care?”

“Even if I’m together with Fahai, you can still take care of me and the child. Just don’t say things like who the child should call father from now on.”

Xu Xian’s eyes nearly cracked as he gritted his teeth. “Then what should I say when others ask who Shilin’s father is!?”

“It’s Fahai. After all, I’m together with him now…”

Fahai affectionately tightened his embrace around Bai Suzhen. Xu Xian, lying on the ground, had completely fallen into despair.

The green hat of a cuckold had already become an unbearable burden for him.

Just then, a woman in green robes carrying a child rushed onto the stage from the side.

Seeing Bai Suzhen, she exclaimed in surprise, “Sister, you!…”

Xu Xian lay on the ground, roaring, “Xiao Qing! Quickly take me away, take me and Shilin away. Let’s leave this place of right and wrong!!”

Bai Suzhen smiled faintly, “Xiao Qing, I’ve said everything…”

A hint of gloom flashed through Xiao Qing’s eyes. “Sorry, I came at the wrong time.”

Fahai extended his hand, smiling. “No, you came at just the right time… Xiao Qing, the affinity between this old monk and you sisters is destined by the heavens. This is all arranged by the Bodhisattva.”

Upon hearing this, Xiao Qing also shyly leaned into Fahai’s embrace.

“This child is Xu Shilin, right?” Fahai teased the child in Xiao Qing’s arms. “You don’t need to worry. This old monk will ask the Child-Sending Guanyin to send him away to cultivate in the South Sea.”

As soon as he finished speaking, a Bodhisattva suspended by ropes descended from the sky and took the child away.

Seeing this, Xu Xian laughed maniacally, frantically tearing at his hair. He left the stage in a deranged state.

Fahai, embracing the two beauties, also left the stage with a triumphant look.

Then the narrator’s voice rang out, probably something about the three of them starting a shameless life while Xu Xian became a destitute, crazy monk.

However, because there were too many things to criticize, Fang Zheng’s soul had already left his body at this point. He hadn’t listened to the content that followed at all. His expression was similar to Xu Xian’s just now on stage.

His entire being had already sunk into contemplation about life…

Is this the Legend of the White Snake I wrote!? Is this the kind of thing the Taoyuan commoners watch nowadays?

Fuck!! They can perform whatever, but the princess and His Majesty are here! Do I still want to save face or not?

I can’t even bear it myself. Who knows how shattered His Majesty and those ministers’ worldviews have become.

Thinking of this, Fang Zheng walked towards his seat with heavy steps.

Just as he took a step, the previously crazed Xu Xian jumped out again.

With a face full of celebration, he said, “Thank you everyone for watching. The Water Dunking Golden Mountain Temple themed event for Legend of the White Snake at Xueyue Tower is currently ongoing. With tonight’s show ticket, you can rent a set of monk robes for free, and kasaya are 50% off!”

“Tomorrow at the same time, we look forward to your attendance for the Legend of Ji Gong!!”

Fuck!!!

Fang Zheng felt like he was struck by lightning! His liver and gall were shattered!

Originally he thought it was over. He never expected the theater and brothel to have a fantastical collaboration at the end…

He never imagined that as soon as he left Taoyuan County, Taoyuan County would immediately step onto the front lines of the times.

Destroy it… hurry up… this planet is no longer livable.

Fang Zheng returned to his seat with trembling legs, staring straight ahead, not uttering a word.

No one said anything. They just sat quietly.

……………..

After sitting for who knows how long, Fang Zheng awkwardly turned his head and looked at Li Miaohan. He saw that Li Miaohan’s cheeks were flushed red as she quickly lowered her head.

Then Fang Zheng looked at Emperor Jing.

He cautiously said, “Your Majesty… What do you think?”

Emperor Jing swallowed his saliva, feeling his face somewhat stiff. He squeezed out two words with difficulty, “Passable.”

“……………..”

Another long period of silence. In the end, Fang Zheng couldn’t sit still anymore.

He stood up and proclaimed loudly, “Alright! Today’s performance has ended. People have been arranged outside to send everyone to the inn to rest. You may all leave!”

As soon as he finished speaking, the crowd impatiently stood up from the sofas and walked out of the theater in a line.

Li Yuanzhao sidled up to him, grinning and giving a big thumbs up. “Old Fang, you’re awesome! The earlier part was brilliant, let me tell you… oh, you should have watched it already.”

“By the way, which way is Xueyue Tower?”

Fang Zheng: “…………….”

Although he didn’t see what fantastic developments there were earlier, Fang Zheng already didn’t want to know and didn’t dare to know.

“Your Highness, go out and ask the guards. I arranged separate accommodations for the princess. I’ll send the princess back to rest first.”

“Then you go.” Li Yuanzhao ran off happily.

Old Fang actually likes watching this kind of vulgar stuff. If he wants to send her, let him send her. His sister would have to be blind to take a liking to him…

After everyone left, Fang Zheng also hurriedly rushed out the door to find Li Miaohan.

Fortunately, he found her quickly, not having gone far. The princess had a group of old palace maids with her, easy to recognize.

Li Miaohan’s cheeks were still flushed red when she saw him, not daring to look directly.

The things she had just watched were really too…

Fang Zheng put on a flattering smile and said, “Your Highness, this minister arranged different accommodations for you. I’ll take you there!”

Li Miaohan nodded a couple of times with her lowered head.

Then she walked side by side with Fang Zheng, the few old palace maids carrying lanterns behind them.

The moon was bright and the stars were few. Occasional insect chirps could be heard nearby. The cool breeze was especially comfortable.

But the atmosphere was slightly awkward.

Fang Zheng wanted to ease it a bit. He stammered, “Ahem, Your Highness, actually this minister’s favorite reading is the Spring and Autumn Annals. I also read the Analects and such.”

“……………..”

“This minister never comes to this kind of place usually. If there’s time, I practice singing and dancing a bit, play some ball and whatnot… to exercise!”

“…………..”

Seeing that the princess remained silent, Fang Zheng was also at a loss. He just said whatever came to mind.

It was just that Li Miaohan remained silent.

Finally, they arrived at the inn entrance. Fang Zheng had already given up. He said recklessly, “Um, did Your Highness enjoy tonight’s performance?”

Li Miaohan secretly glanced around.

Then she slowly raised her head and looked straight at Fang Zheng.

Her big eyes still appeared bright and moist under the faint light emanating from the inn, but her expression couldn’t be clearly seen.

Suddenly, she bloomed into a smile facing Fang Zheng, like a hundred flowers blossoming… Fang Zheng was a bit entranced seeing it.

Then she forcefully nodded and shyly said,

“I loved watching it!”