My Friend’s Harem Is Obsessed With Me

“So.”

Kruhum and blowing a puff of air, Kurika looks at me with a peculiar glare. I didn’t expect him to find me this pathetic, but I’m dead serious.

“Did you escape?”

“Oh, come on, choose your words carefully. I didn’t run away; I just came to take a break.”

“You mean to the Forest of the Demon Realm, known as the hell of the continent?”

Kurika points around. It’s still quite unfamiliar, yet a gloomy darkness lingers, creating a bleak and barren atmosphere.

Even though the place reeked of blood, strangely, I felt comfortable here.

“After all, hell for some can be a vacation for others.”

“Hmm.”

Kurika, arms crossed, tilts his head slightly down at me.

“It doesn’t seem like someone who ran away from home should say that.”

“Ugh.”

Ouch, that hit a sore spot.

“No, I have my reasons! The firstborn is still growing, and they’re already talking about making a second child. How many kids do we already have…?”

“Aren’t you just using the kids as an excuse to take a break?”

This wolf pup… so annoyingly sharp.

“No way! Do you really understand the love I have for my wife and kids?”

I force my words out, but Kurika just smirks, nodding his head.

“Well, it just so happens there’s a guest in the Forest of the Demon Realm, and you know her.”

“Guest?”

I wonder what that means when suddenly heavy footsteps are heard, thud thud.

“The Dragon God?”

A massive golden dragon, unable to be hidden even by the dense trees of the Forest of the Demon Realm, Shakallim, was staying there.

I look at Kurika, whose ridiculous smile shines through his shock.

“You’re in a similar situation. You two should get along well.”

“What are you talking about?”

Kruhum.

I turn away, but where can that giant body go? The Dragon God lets out a deep sigh and eventually confesses.

“The Dragoness told me to take a break for a while.”

“Zane?”

I heard she’s been working hard to break the tradition of excessively serving the Dragon God. I felt proud of her efforts, though it was quite embarrassing that the Dragon God got kicked out by just one goddess.

“How long do you think it’ll be? It’s not like you’re on friendly terms.”

I shrug my shoulders in response to the Dragon God’s words.

“I’d say about a week? I can’t be away for too long, or the kids will get mad.”

“Oh right, did you not bring the kids with you?”

Kurika asks with a slightly hopeful expression, and I immediately frown.

“Do you know where we are? This is the Forest of the Demon Realm. They call it hell on the continent.”

“…But earlier you said it was a vacation.”

“That only applies to me.”

How could I possibly bring the kids to the Forest of the Demon Realm? I hoped they wouldn’t come unless they wanted to learn swordsmanship from me later on.

“Ah, but there is one who followed me.”

I realize I almost forgot and glance at the cabin. A reminder of my past as Sherpa, the cabin Eris built stands firm.

The reason it still exists is that Kurika regularly looks after it.

“Daniel! T-t, communication! There’s a communication!”

A girl-child figure bursts out of the cabin, her silver hair reaching her heels, stained with paint — the Goddess of Time.

“What? Communication?!”

I snatch the communication orb thrown by the Goddess of Time and clear my voice. I’m ready.

“Help me out here. Just keep it vague.”

When I tell Kurika, he frowns as if to ask what I mean.

But I’ve already received the communication.

– Daniel?

The sharp words of Rin cut through. I could already tell her mood was off from past experience.

“Uh, I got it.”

– There’s a note left in the room that says you received an urgent message from Kurika and went briefly to the Forest of the Demon Realm?

“Oh! Right! Kurika said there were dangerous magical beasts appearing in the Forest of the Demon Realm and asked for some help.”

I point at myself, wondering? as Kurika stares, I give him a look to get with it.

– So, there’s a magical beast Kurika will struggle with?

“Originally, you wouldn’t know, but there are many peculiar magical beasts here. Sometimes unique ones pop up.”

– ……

No matter what, the ecosystem of the Forest of the Demon Realm is my turf. What I say is practically truth, so there’s no contesting that.

– When are you coming back?

“Maybe about a week?”

I shared my hopeful estimate, but her voice immediately rises sharply.

– You’re joking, right? You leave without a word for a week?!

“No, really, it’s a dangerous magical beast.”

Anxiety visible, the Goddess of Time chimes in, adding sound effects.

Ku, kuwah! Kuwahaaa!

Oh no.

– Don’t tell me that sound just now is the dangerous magical beast?

The killing intent in her voice felt like it could kill the Goddess of Time in an instant. But at that moment, a really good surprise appeared.

I gesture to the Dragon God, who was looking down on us. It seems he’s learned to be alert after being scolded by the Dragoness.

He stretches his head towards the sky and opens his mouth wide.

Kraaaaaaaaaaah!

That roar shakes the entirety of the Forest of the Demon Realm.

Quite excessive, don’t you think? But Rin’s voice grows serious.

– Is it for real?

“Uh, yeah! It seems like it’s nearby! Sorry! I have to hang up first! Send my regards to the others! I’ll be there soon!”

Click.

I end the communication and wipe off the cold sweat. Kurika and Shakallim look at me with pity.

Meanwhile, the Goddess of Time and I high-five and share a laugh.

“Success!”

“Success indeed!”

As we hugged and celebrated, time’s goddess had gotten her paint on my clothes, so I pushed her away immediately.

“If your paint gets on my clothes, Eris will get mad when she does the laundry.”

“…I can relate to that.”

The Goddess of Time shudders and shakes her head, having suffered the most from Eris.

“But now I’ve extended my working period by a week! I can go a whole week without changing diapers! Kids are great!”

She bounded off to paint again. Excluding Princess Elise, the Goddess of Time has become the top earner in our house recently.

Her paintings go to auction to sell.

By the way, Eve comes in second. She’s been living off royalty needs, even while lounging at home, managing to generate income.

Meanwhile, I, the husband, have only graduated from the Academy recently and am still in search of a job.

“Sigh, society isn’t easy.”

As I exhale, Kurika responds, looking puzzled.

“Why not continue as a Sherpa? There are always people looking for the Forest of the Demon Realm.”

Naturally, that means the rewards are substantial. Sometimes, greedy people or those looking to gather rare herbs venture here.

“They say not to. I already have too many kids; what good would it do if I took on dangerous tasks?”

“……Looks like you have good wives.”

“Sigh, isn’t there supposed to be some kind of retirement benefit for this? I saved the world but ended up with nothing substantial.”

Here I am, stuck playing the role of a pillar support.

I think about becoming a knight, but I can’t stray too far from home, so I can’t join a knight order rashly.

Even trying to join the guards would yield only a pittance in contrast to what everyone else is earning.

“Being the head of a household seems tough.”

I sigh again, staring up at the sky. If I could see sunlight through the dense trees, I might have been allowed to muse.

All I could see were the leftovers of magical beasts scattered around like droppings.

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