Madman’s Retirement

As Grant got out of the tent he smelled a familiar scent.

Eggs.

Indeed, as he exited the tent he witnessed the minotaur Granite making green eggs, with two plates out.

"I do like green eggs, I do like green eggs and ham Sam I am," muttered Grant as he sat down.

Granite looked at him quickly before going back to his work.

"Good dreams?" he asked.

"Bittersweet."

The minotaur nodded before scraping the eggs onto the two plates.

As Grant ate, he nodded satisfactorily.

"Phaeron eggs. Good as usual."

Granite looked at him curiously. "You know of them?" he asked.

Grant nodded. "Of course. Minotaur tribes like to keep them because of how hardy they are and how easy they are to maintain. Your bag has temporal qualities?" He asked back.

Granite nodded. "Yes, this came from a tribe I passed a few days back. My bag slows the rotting speed of food to maybe 1:50 the time? And what about yours?" He pried.

Grant chuckled. "1:100 the time dilation. I got it as a lucky find in a dungeon."

Granite nodded before going back to eating.

Eventually though Granite got chatty again, definitely chatty for a minotaur at least.

"Why aren't you afraid of me." he said without hesitation, causing Grant to sigh with exasperation.

"Ah yes, just the way I like my meals." Grant said sarcastically. "A little bit of a light meal of eggs, with a heavy dose of real world dourness. Do we have to do this now." asked Grant. "We could do this later."

The bull did not budge. "Even the neutral adventurers have become more hesitant to work with others that do not share certain status. Even I have had issues recently."

"-always had that issue." Grant corrected.

"-yet you have shown no issue with working with a minotaur in spite of their reputation."

Grant nodded, as he slowly ate his eggs and then asked a question.

"You ever been to the east?" he asked.

The minotaur looked confused but played along nonetheless. "No."

Grant nodded. "In the eastern lands of the Qing empire the adventurer's guild is very much not a thing. Instead, the people often dispatched to kill monsters and deal with bandits are martial artists and cultivators, who are essentially the major powers there."

"Your point?"

"Cultivators are a fairly vicious crowd, as are martial artists. No one can be trusted, and anyone might turn on you one day. Tell me why people are scared of minotaurs."

"Because feral minotaurs are known to eat human flesh."

Grant shrugged. "So?"

"It eats human flesh as a preference." The minotaur said bitterly, recalling how often humans had judged him for something the less savory side of their race had done.

"So? Minotaurs aren't human. In the east, it's not uncommon for people to eat people though."

Now the minotaur was flabbergasted. "Really?" He asked. The idea of humans eating humans was an unnatural thought, something that people considered taboo, for all "civilized" found themselves disgusted at the notion of eating their own kind.

Grant chuckled. "Well, eating may not be the correct word. Eating may be a fate kinder than what they do to some people.

Having said that, one friend of mine did try to eat me in order to advance his growth.

It's not uncommon for people to turn people into living furnaces in order to use them to create medication.

It may not be literal eating, but proverbial eating is a very common thing there.

It's like noble politics if all the nobles were given swords and the ability to fight."

The minotaur nodded, adapting quickly, seemingly understanding his point. "So you do not trust anyone then? Always holding a knife in hand?" Was that why the man agreed so readily? Because everyone is a possible suspect?

Grant cocked his hand to indicate so-so. "Not necessarily. True, spending time in the cultivation world has made me wary of everyone, but it's not just a matter of distrusting everyone equally y'know? Tell me, why should I find myself disgusted at minotaurs eating human flesh? Plenty of monsters eat flesh, yet everyone targets minotaurs for that.

Besides, why would I confuse feral for sapient? I know the difference. To act like one is a horrid monster because of its relation to the other is a foolish thought.

One should not judge a race by their poor individuals"

To this, the minotaur nodded his head in agreement.

Grant chuckled. "Truthfully, the one I really fear is human race. After all, the most dangerous one is not the monster that shows itself, but the monster hiding under the guise of innocence.

I can deal with a predator that does not hide; a wolf in sheep's clothing can leap when you least expect it. "

Although the minotaur seemed satisfied with the answer he received, breakfast was essentially ruined so the conversation stopped there.

It was more trekking through the forest here on out, and there were slightly stronger monsters in these parts.

They ran into one land raker tarantula though, a c- rank monster.

Grant lunged forward, attracting the arachnids attention, using a taunt formed out of mana to distract the beast.

The land raker was known for it's elemental threads, rather than spinning threads and instead choosing to generate rocks in the form of webs, clearly meant more to crush their foes rather than be stick and entrap their foes.

Grant ran around, carefully dodging the intricate patterns shot at him, weaving through the small holes or side stepping the traps while Granite surged forward, weapon in hand.

Once Granite was in bludgeoning distance, the arachnid quickly changed direction, using it's earthen threads to attempt to try crushing the beast that had gotten too close.

What the monster hadn't predicted was the minotaur dispersing the earth raker's magic, causing the earthen threads to fall to pieces and then the minotaur swiftly brought the bludgeon down, stunning the tarantula for a second, in which Grant took his chance to cut off two legs, hindering the 6 legged beast.

At least, now it was a six legged beast.

The beast wasn't done however, creating giant metal spikes that popped out of the ground.

Despite his burly shape, the minotaur was still very much capable of dodging the erupting spikes, as Grant danced along closing in again, scratching out some of the eyes, causing it to hiss in pain.

Missing some of it's eyes, it could not see the bludgeon that came for 2 legs to the left, nor the final blade that plunged into its center, ending its life.

Granite grunted while looking at the beast. "C rank monster. Relatively in good condition, it should be worth something good. Will the legs do?." he asked Grant.

Grant nodded. "The legs are great materials, and will definitely add a little to my aesthetic. I'm guessing you'll take the magic organ that's replaced it's silk producing organ and the tiny vestigial silk organ."

It was a nice hunt, a simple appetizer before the main course.

And the next day they arrived at the location of the cockatrice.

The fourth of July is one of my favorite holidays to celebrate. 

Not because I'm American of course, I'm Nordic after all. 

However, I do enjoy myself a good barbecue.  

I prep my best cuts of dragon and pieces of dry aged erymanthian boar and cuts of the bull of Cretan. My favorite cuts of meat. 

I invite friends over, and the dragons who I got the cuts from as well as the erymanthian boar and the Cretan bull.

I don't kill those dragons after all, and I do have a mildly sick sense of humor. 

Most of those dragons do come in the end, because dragon meat is tasty, so they do a little self cannibalism. 

The boar and the bull are very much not sentient so I'm pretty sure they just shred the invitations I send.

It does get a bit awkward when the minotaur himself comes over for the fourth of july though, cause his dad's on the menu. 

I mean, he managed to drop the bad habit of cannibalism, so he gets kind of uncomfortable being offered slabs of cretan bull. 

But that special gu sauce is just to die for(after doing the ancient poisonous gu method but with living slime sauces) I have created a delicious mildly unnatural sauce that just goes great on everything. 

And the fireworks are just amazing and kind of have to be done on the mountain tops because if we did them in any city in new york it'd probably look less like a firework even and more like a terrorist attack. 

Happy early fourth of july everyone, and stay away from mt. olympus this year.

We're scheduling a fire works event using phoenix down and the flames of the sun so this year may be particularly explosive.

-Grant