Chapter 60 - I Won't Miss a Day for a Week, Limited Time Offer!
Although I tried to maintain a light atmosphere throughout, it was a rather rough and difficult fight.
Subduing without killing is not an easy task.
Even in modern times with advanced tools like tasers, there are still criminals who need to be subdued with live ammunition.
It couldn’t have been easy to endure among rabid disease patients, no, rabid cat disease patients, with their eyes half-rolled back and sharp fangs bared.
Still, without any injuries…
“Ah, Saha! Your thigh is bleeding!”
“I see. Thank you for pointing that out. This much should heal quickly if bandaged, or I could ask Yohena.”
…There were some injuries, but it eased my mind that we could finish without any life-threatening wounds.
Especially in Saha’s case, since I confiscated her usual weapon and replaced it with a non-lethal one.
She must have worked hard to control her strength too.
“Yohena! Over here! Please take a look at Saha!”
“Yeeees!”
Today’s greatest contributor.
The most significant contributor to pioneering the non-lethal route.
The living legend saint herself.
I called Yohena to treat our heroes’ wounds first, including Saha’s.
Anyway, the prisoners of war are alive.
As long as they’re alive, it’s fine. They could have died.
We saved their lives.
Thinking I should put a praise sticker on Yohena’s forehead later, I turned my attention back to Roen.
“R-rather kill me nyan…! Bad doggy! Pig doggy! Gluttonous doggy!”
Roen, with his hands and feet tightly bound, was very indignant, just slapping his tail on the ground.
That repetitive noun speech style is really cringeworthy and hard to get used to.
“It’s pretty edible woof! One more? One more! Wang!”
The brave general Lumi, who single-handedly broke through enemy lines and captured the enemy commander with the mysterious strategy of clone technique,
Was taking out Churu one by one from the pouch confiscated from Roen and savoring them in her mouth.
Each time a Churu disappeared, the empty Churu packet fell with a plop.
“Nyaaak…!”
It fell perfectly right in front of Roen’s nose.
Five had already piled up.
“Lumi, how many are left?”
“Only a little bit left woof, Master!”
At Lumi’s words, Roen’s face turned pale.
And his trembling pupils moved focus from the pouch in Lumi’s hand, to my face, to the empty Churu packets that had been tragically sucked dry and left only with scent, back and forth repeatedly.
“Th-that’s really precious nyan…! Y-you absolutely can’t eat them all nyan…!”
I see.
So that’s how it is.
I answered that desperate plea with 100% sincerity.
“You don’t say?”
I scratched my outfit while wearing the most vile smile I could muster.
Courtesy towards a captured enemy commander?
There’s no such thing.
You should be grateful we’re not doing anything cruel enough to be considered a war crime.
“Nyaaak! I’ll talk, I’ll talk…!”
There was still one left.
“Really? Sounds suspicious. Lumi. Eat one more. If it doesn’t taste good, throw it to Renatel.”
“Hmm, it’s not that delicious, but it’s still edible woof! Nyam!”
“Why suddenly me…?”
“How, how can you be so cruuuel…! Sob, waaah…!”
I succeeded in driving him to the ground.
Roen started wailing.
Regret for daring to defy the hero party trusting in Neb.
The devastation felt watching the Churu taken away before his eyes.
And the obsession with the ones still remaining.
After feeding him this much of a sweet potato.
Now it’s time to give the promised cider.
“Now then, there’s no point in lying since it’ll all be obvious anyway. Let’s go over everything again carefully one by one.”
By the way, today’s lie detector is Tinya.
If the response is ‘That sounds pretty plausible! It seems right!’, it’s a lie.
If the response is ‘That’s strange. Isn’t it too obvious?’, it’s the truth.
Damn it, Tinya.
Are you the strongest even at lie detection…!
Roen, who finished his passionate confession shedding tears and snot.
Roen’s testimony received the certification mark from Tinya saying ‘How can there be such an obvious story that even Tinya can predict? It’s rather more suspicious!’
It means it’s a 100% reliable story.
When I gave Tinya a Churu as a reward, she took one bite and spat it out with a ugh.
She can use the nya nya style well, but it seems she hasn’t trained the cat-style eating habits yet.
“Nyaaa…! Seven… only seven left…!”
I felt a tiny bit of sympathy watching Roen clutching the recovered Churu pouch and wailing while calculating the reduced amount, but.
A prisoner is a prisoner.
It was obvious he’d be troublesome again on the 19th floor if we let him go.
“Enya, keep a good watch on him.”
“On the honor of the wolf-kin, I shall keep a good watch on the cat-kin.”
“Don’t cut their tail fur.”
“…”
What’s this?
This silence?
She hasn’t picked up the habit of ‘looting’ from Renatel in the meantime, has she?
It’s a bit worrying, but.
That’s it for today.
Our financial state is approaching a capital erosion crisis.
We need money, money…!
A shop owner always suffering from gold shortage.
Is this really okay?
Bang──
My BB gun-grade revolver made a very refreshing sound as it hit the empty liquor bottle.
It didn’t even make it wobble, let alone knock it over.
In other words.
My spiritual pressure.
That is, the balance of lovely gold coins neatly stacked in crates was approaching the bottom.
“Sigh.”
Ironically, the problem lay with me.
The floors of the tower we’ve conquered can be freely accessed even by heroes who haven’t contracted with me.
Of course, it’s not in the form of receiving missions and clearing zones one by one like me, who’s close to a revelator.
Instead, vast fields like open worlds freely open up, and uncontracted heroes defeat monsters there as they can, mine minerals, and engage in various production activities.
But?
We buy most of the byproducts from there.
We can’t not buy them because the shop’s popularity and reputation would plummet if we don’t!
No matter how much I extorted the uncontracted heroes’ pocket money, no, alcohol-soaked money, it was like pouring water into a bottomless jar.
This won’t do.
We need a constitutional improvement…!
Eventually.
“Um, Elise?”
“My my. For our Master Ark to seek out this humble servant first, and with such a pitiful expression no less. Fufu, shall I hug you? Or kiss your cheek? Or, have you finally decided to engage in the sublime act?”
The girl’s action flirting immediately poured in!
But I couldn’t fall for such light temptation.
Yohena would stick her bible in my head.
…It’s still okay to look, but there’s still some emotional distance when it comes to touching.
If that wasn’t the case, I would have already graduated from being a virgin.
Probably. Maybe not.
“That’s not it… Do you happen to have any alchemy potions that could sell for a high price in the shop?”
“Hmm.”
Elise’s eyes narrowed.
“Aphrodisiacs are not allowed.”
They would surely sell well, but.
“My, excluding what would sell best, are you perhaps testing this humble servant? Let’s see, what would be good.”
As Elise hummed and went to the potion display to touch them one by one, I took my gaze off her and looked at my smartphone.
…She had already reached Alchemy level 3.
She really has talent.
“Hmm, how about this?”
I examined the potions Elise handed over.
Temporary Sleep Liberation Potion
“If you drink this, you can walk around normally without sleeping for about three days?”
That’s really tempting…
But there’s no such thing as free sleep loan in this world.
This is a lesson I’ve learned deep in my bones while working nearly 90 hours over 6 days a week.
“Side effects?”
“Well, when the effect wears off, you’ll sleep as much as you couldn’t sleep all at once?”
“Rejected.”
Look at her spouting nonsense with such an innocent expression.
Geez.
While looking at various drugs with excellent effects but crazy performance that would turn people into half-idiots as a backlash, as if they were some gear third.
I wondered if the maximum level of alchemy wasn’t actually 99.
So the products of a mere level 3 are this shabby.
I made such a very reasonable inference.
But.
“Th-this is…!”
“Oh my, Master Ark, is your hair health not good these days? It’s a big problem if you’re like this at such a young age.”
I felt like I had received a divine revelation, to the point where I could barely hear Elise’s loud barking.
In Celestia, the city of heroes, naturally many people other than heroes reside.
It was originally an existing city, and in terms of ratio, it was a city where quite a lot of people had gathered to the point where non-heroes could be considered the vast majority.
The heroes are here, so it’s safe!
It’s easy to get items that are hard to find elsewhere!
Safety and economic issues can be sufficient motivation to willingly leave one’s home and settle in a new city.
And in the market street of Celestia.
“Come, come, the medicine has arrived! The legendary medicine has arrived!”
A hooded man appeared.
Moreover, together with the saint who is respected by everyone in the city.
The attention of everyone on the street was drawn.
Legendary medicine? Is there such a thing?
He looks like a cheap medicine peddler, but the saint is with him.
Is that person next to him the revelator?
No, that’s the owner of that general store, the one heroes frequently visit. I saw it with my own eyes.
Murmur murmur.
Everyone expressed their impressions about this unusual sight that couldn’t normally be observed.
When a decent number of people had gathered.
The suspicious hooded medicine peddler opened his mouth.
“Every morning. You’ve been stressed seeing the pile of hair on your pillow and in the bathroom, right?”
Area-of-effect provocation!
The bald, or true bald, or balding all became indignant at once.
If it weren’t for the saint, they would have grabbed that crazy medicine peddler bastard right away and, just!
Regardless of such a disrespectful atmosphere.
“First, I’ll tell you about the side effects of this legendary medicine. When you take this medicine, your appetite will become voracious, and if you don’t control yourself, you might quickly become a pig.”
What on earth is he saying?
Is there any crazy person who would take medicine that turns them into a pig?
The city people became even more confused.
“How can such a medicine be legendary!”
Even despite the saint’s presence, voices of protest started to emerge.
But the suspicious skinny medicine peddler didn’t yield to this.
He dropped the bomb he had prepared.
“If you drink this medicine, your hair won’t fall out for 1 week! Limited sale, only 20 bottles!”
Immediately after.
Madness overflowed in the square.
Amidst that frenzied scene.
Yohena hung her head low, unable to overcome the rising embarrassment, but.
“Y-yes… It’s true that it works…”
Because she was a saint who could not lie to the goddess, she gave the medicine peddler’s authority weight by attaching the holy see’s official certification mark to the citizens’ questions.
It didn’t even take 10 minutes to sell out.
Ark’s Capitalism-How-Revolver became powerful enough to easily shatter liquor bottles and have power to spare.
Still, it was only about 0.1 Lumi in power.