Special Program — Arc 3

 

“Salutations to all readers, welcome to the first ever Diary of an Adventuring Vampire Special Program! I’m your host, Azure. Today, we’ll be joined by PROCRASTINATOR, Flandre, and Kurui!” (Azure)

 

“Salutations.” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“Hola.” (Kurui)

 

“Kurui that language doesn’t exist here” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“Hello~” (Flandre)

 

“To anyone unaware how this works, this is a non-canonical discussion of events that have and will happen. So, let’s get started.” (Azure)

 

“““Yeah!””” (Everyone)

 

“Let’s talk about Ei’s revenge first~ It was really fun. Especially the part where she practically nuked the forest!” (Flandre)

 

“It was certainly an event of all time.” (Kurui)

 

“Well, you can blame PROCRASTINATOR for that one. The entire idea of Sylventris dying was his idea.” (Azure)

 

“Who can blame me, I’ve read too many books and death is the most common character motivation!” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“You don’t read enough webnovels.” (Azure)

 

“It makes good content tho, ya know?” (Kurui)

 

“It was fun~” (Flandre)

 

“Well, let’s talk about the next thing! The Vampyric Shogunate.” (Azure)

 

“Ooo! I know this one!” (Flandre)

 

“Yea, you’re the Shogun.” (Kurui)

 

“Can someone explain what this means???” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“The Vampyric Shogunate area is inspired by ancient Japan, although I doubt Azure knows much about it….” (Flandre)

 

“Oi! I learned about it in history a few years ago…” (Azure)

 

“Ehhh but do you remember anything?” (Kurui)

 

“Yes?” (Azure)

 

“That’s not the point! Anyways, despite being called the ‘Vampuric Shogunate’, most of the ruling is done by the Empress, aka my sister! It’s too much paperwork for me…” (Flandre)

 

“Oh yea, that one character we discussed, what was her name again? I forgot” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“Remilia Scarlet— I mean Crimson. The entire castle is a giant Touhou reference. I mean, it’s called the Crimson Devil Mansion.” (Azure)

 

“It’s still a castle though~” (Flandre)

 

“I'm so uncultured, I don’t even know what Touhou is… I’m only here for the laughs, and to yell at Azure ‘WE NEED A CHAPTER POSTED IN THE NEXT HOUR’” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“Edit faster.” (Azure)

 

“Anyways, you’re going to have to wait a while to get to the Vampyric Shogunate, because first we gotta get there!” (Azure)

 

“But I can teleport!” (Kurui)

 

“And you haven’t been there in long enough to safely do so.” (Azure)

 

“I can too~” (Flandre)

 

“You’re not allowed to. I’ll think of a reason later… probably just ‘the party needs more training’.” (Azure)

 

“Explain how walking down a tunnel, or should I say falling, is training?” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“It’s just faster than the stairs?” (Azure)

 

“Okay! Last topic! What happened to Ori???” (Kurui)

 

“Who’s that~?” (Flandre)

 

“Ei’s rival… but then school got shortened so that never really happened. So, Ori is more of a self proclaimed rival. I dunno, I skipped like three months of school time in order for revenge to happen.” (Azure)

 

“HOW DID I MISS THIS PLOT HOLE AAAAAAAAAAA” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“It’s not a plot hole? The only plot hole is Kambia who I never found out how to wrap up… She’ll appear again, eventually.” (Azure)

 

“Also, what happened to Wiluare? He was there for a bit, I liked him” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“He’s a rando~” (Flandre)

 

“I doubt he’s gettin’ more page time.” (Kurui)

 

“Sad Editor noises” (PROCRASTINATOR)

 

“Yeah, probably not. Well, that’s all for today, folks! Leave questions in the comments and maybe we’ll get to the next time for the halfway discussion! But first, this report is sponsored by RAID SHADO—” (Azure) (not actually)

 

Bonus Clip: 

 

『What? [[[program]]] A special』? special』?(ERROR) 『We[maybe]ll, I’ll [[it]] crash. No more reading [[[next time]]] you ! for  (What? A special program? Well, maybe I’ll crash it next time… No more reading for you!)